It takes a certain kind of individual to appear on a show like Just Tattoo of Us. After all, what kind of sane, unassuming person would let someone leave a hideous permanent mark on their bodies just for a bit of telly time?
But they do – and we love watching them.
Here, we revisit some of the worst tatts we have ever seen on the show.
WARNING: Those of you with a delicate nature may find some of these images and stories incredibly (and deliciously) offensive! Seriously: they're repugnant.
Right, on with the horror.
1. The SLUT stamp
Blood might be thicker than water, but that doesn't mean you can trust a family member to choose a tasteful tatt for you.
When cousins Lauren and Sophie appeared on the show, there were tears aplenty when Lauren chose to have the charming word "SLUT" etched on to Sophie.
Apparently it was a dig at the fact that her cousin had slept with four of her boyfriend's mates. The greedy minx!
2. The bloody tampon
Oh dear… As we all know, every tattoo on the show has a story to tell, and this particular one – a bloody tampon being removed – has a particularly unusual one.
So please continue with caution.
Alicia explained to Charlotte and Bear that she had decided to design her mate Louisa's etching after having once done a good deed for her.
"She had gone home with a really ugly boy," she explained. "She was on her period and had forgot she had a tampon in so I had to assist with removing her tampon."
We don't quite follow the logic, but what a good friend, eh?
3. The soiled fingers
Attention-seeking Big Brother 2016 couple Ryan Ruckledge and Hughie Maughan squared up to each other after they copped an eyeful of the unsightly tattoos they had designed for each other.
For Hughie, Ryan had chosen a picture of his own orange face scrawled onto Hughie's butt cheek surrounded by the ominous words PROPERTY OF RYAN RUCKLEDGE.
Unsurprisingly this caused Hughie to freak out and screech blue murder (in his pants).
But don't feel too sorry for Hughie, because the tatt he designed for Ryan was even worse – fingers with, er, poo on them!
The story behind the image? We could tell you, but you wouldn't thank us for it. It's basically what you think it is.
4. Father figure
In some ways, the tattoo that Charlotte Dawson's mate Katie Salmon designed for her is actually a rather sweet and touching choice, as it depicts her late, comedy-legend dad, Les Dawson.
And surprisingly – for this show – Charlotte actually loved the finished result and shed some tears of actual love not anger.
But hang on a minute. As lovely as the heartfelt tribute is, just think about the reality of this tattoo.
We've seen what Charlotte got up to on Ex on the Beach and Celebs Go Dating, so just imagine what a buzzkill this tatt could be when she and a fella are getting jiggy...
While Just Tattoo of Us is supposedly a cheeky, fun series, some contestants do have a rather mean agenda.
When former Ex on the Beach star Maisie Gillespie appeared on an ep with her boyfriend Ollie, it wasn't just for profile-building – it was also to make a life-changing decision.
When her beau eventually removed his fear goggles, he was horrified to see that the tattoo she had designed for him was of an image of a man's legs poking out of a skip accompanied by the ominous words 'DUMPED'.
Yep, the vengeful minx had kicked her boyfriend to the kerb in the most outrageous of ways.
"What a twat," were the first words Ollie could muster as he got his head around the full horror of having the permanent stamp etched on his leg. But don't feel too much sympathy for him. According to Maisie, he had been lying to her about messaging his ex.
However, when Maisie saw the romantic design that Ollie had dreamt up for her – a heart-shaped lock with the words 'I Love You' underneath – she was shellshocked and clearly felt bad about her drastic decision.
6. Trump rump!
What's worse than having a tatt of your ex etched permanently on your body? A tattoo of one of the world's most divisive leaders, that's what.
Well, that's what a guy called Cory was stuck with when he and his friend appeared on the show.
But while most people would kick off about being stuck with a dodgy tatt like that, excitable Cory said he actually loved it and even went as far as to say that he thought Trump was a bit of a legend.
Bear summed up the experience best when he said: "Cory came in with one arse in his pants and now he's leaving with two!"
When Bronte saw the tattoo her cheating boyfriend Jack had designed for her, she broke down in tears – because the seemingly innocent image of an umbrella was actually a mean-spirited reference to his ex-girlfriend April (as in 'April showers'). The rat!
But the emotional miss had her revenge. When Jack unveiled her design, he was horrified to see an image of Bronte staring back at him from his chest with the words: "I have a girlfriend."
The idea, she said, was that he would never be able to cheat on her again.
Presenter Scotty T's reaction to the vengeful tatt was priceless: "Now that Jack has got his bird on his chest, he'll never get another bird on his bellend again!"
8. The squatter
Charlotte and Scotty didn't know where to look when Kierra saw the dodgy tatt that her mate Rihanna had designed for her.
Forget cute flowers or bunnies, her pal had come up with a design depicting a naked woman squatting as she – how to put this? – performed a toilet act.
Her mate explained that the idea was inspired by the time Kierra indulged in a very intimate sex act, which caused her to follow through. TMI, anyone? Not for this show, it's not.
When it came to Kierra's design for her mate, Rihanna was perturbed by the image of a pile of gold bars and a shovel, suggesting that she was a gold digger.
While she was a wee bit peeved at the insinuation, we reckon she was relieved it wasn't as gross as the one she'd picked for Kierra.
Not many guys and gals feel happy about showing their parents their fresh tattoo, but poor Omar certainly had no intention of showing his mate's dirty work to his family after their appearance on the show.
Why? Because the offending image depicted him having sex with his mother, doggy-style.
And just to make it clear who the two frisky pups were, his mate insisted that their names were also included around the image.
However, Omar surprised everyone by saying that he didn't actually think that the tattoo was that all that "bad" and that he had previously made jokes about having sex with his mother for laughs, adding "incest is a funny topic".
10. Cereal cheater
Serial cheater Fran got his just desserts when his brother requested a box of cereal be etched on to his calf with the words "No. 1 Cereal Cheater".
While most men would have been cringing about the stamp, Fran took it in his stride and laughed it off.
PJ was most definitely up for a laugh when he went on Just Tattoo of Us, but when he clapped eyes on the tatts his mate Harrison had designed for him, he was not only shocked but heartbroken.
Instead of good old-fashioned, stereotypical skull and cross bones, his wicked pal had chosen to turn him into a walking sexual-health advert featuring related words like 'HPV', 'clap' and 'herpes'…
Tearfully, PJ walked off the set asking his friend, "is this how little our friendship means to us?"
Later Harrison, in an emotional conversation with his bezza, tried to explain that he was merely worried about PJ's lifestyle and had issued the tatts as a sexual-health warning to him. Awww, sweet, no?
12. Bear Cheek
When Scotty T joined the show as presenter for series three, replacing original host and Charlotte's ex Stephen Bear, he agreed to undergo a special stamping designed by Ms Crosby herself.
But if he thought his Geordie Shore best mate was going to be kind to him, he was wrong.
The conniving wee minx had ordered the show's tattooist to etch Bear's shocked face into Scotty's bum.
Luckily Scotty T was able to see the funny side and joked, "That's the face he made when he got sacked!" before laying into Charlotte and the show's team by firing a round of "f**k yous" at them.
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