Aretha's late reply, Phil Collins' divorce notice – and other famous faxes

It is 2018, and the NHS has announced it is phasing out faxes. The health secretary, Matt Hancock, wants healthcare to be fax-free by 2020 and has banned the purchase of any more machines. (Did I mention it is 2018?) We recall some of the format’s finest moments.

Phil Collins’ divorce fax

Collins says the persistent rumour that he asked his second wife for a divorce by fax damaged his public persona and was a factor in his decision to retire from music. He insists that it is baseless – although he did fax his wife about their impending divorce. “I was in Frankfurt and sent her a fax because the phone kept going down,” he said in 2016. “I was arranging time to see the kids and referenced the fact that [the marriage] was over, but it was translated as me finishing our relationship by fax.”

Julie Burchill v Camille Paglia

History’s most vitriolic and unhinged fax war kicked off in 1993 when Paglia was asked to write about Burchill’s book for The Modern Review. Paglia demurred because Burchill had previously negatively reviewed her own book – and all this spiralled into the pair directly duelling via fax. Burchill called Paglia “pathetic”. Paglia fired back that Burchill was “a sheltered, pampered sultan of slick, snide wordplay, without direct experience of life of any kind”, who nobody had even heard of outside of England. The faxes were later published in the Modern Review by the then editor, Toby Young, who, in doing so, turned Paglia’s wrath on himself.

Aretha Franklin v Dionne Warwick

One of the greatest ever celebrity beef stories, and an obvious precursor to Cardi B and Nicki Minaj’s back-and-forth on Instagram. At Whitney Houston’s funeral in 2012, Warwick referred to Franklin as Houston’s godmother. Cut to HALF A DECADE later, and an Associated Press reporter received a “lengthy fax” from Franklin denying it. A particularly beautiful detail is that Franklin clarified that she was asked to be godmother, but declined because she was “too busy”.

Stephen Hawking’s snark

Rather incongruous, this – in 1995, the fashion bible the Face got in touch with Hawking to ask whether he had “equations for time travel”. Hawking’s succinct faxed reply: “I do not have equations for time travel. If I did, I would win the national lottery every week.” That must have left magazines editors with … red faces.

David Bowie and Laurie Anderson

When David Bowie told Laurie Anderson he thought she could read minds, her response was:“You know, I’m pretty sure I can’t.” But Bowie was convinced, and had Anderson randomly fax him pictures she had drawn to see if they matched up with his own. Apparently they did, prompting the question: what if it was really Bowie who could read minds? Answers via fax, please.