Okay, this story is bananas.
Today, Chrissy Teigen turned to the internet for grocery shopping help and, apparently, the internet was more than happy to oblige.
if u have 6 BROWN bananas in the LA area, I will send my assistant to your home with a signed cookbook, John's underwear and a Becca palette- christine teigen (@chrissyteigen) September 21, 2017
Chrissy, Twitter's fun neighbor from downstairs, knocked on everyone's virtual door looking for six brown bananas to aid in her in making banana bread. And, of course, people from here to Holland were quick to offer their bananas. Folks were pressed!
i have 6 brown bananas in Washington DC does that count- Hannah Radner (@hlradner) September 21, 2017
This is my moment ... define "la area" pic.twitter.com/Q50hDIx41z- jaz (@Jazzzyx0) September 21, 2017
I'm not hating. You better believe I jumped in a Lyft and ran up in Trader Joe's screaming "Bring me your most mottled fruit! It's a celebrity emergency."
I am actually impressed by the number of people on the internet who just have brown bananas chilling in their houses at this moment. Is everyone making bread or are we all just too ambitious about how many fruits and veggies we're planning on eating. Normally, I'd force myself to eat anything that's starting to turn but now I'm going to hold on to it all just in case a celebrity needs it. Hey, Armie Hammer, if you need a peach that has seen better days, holla atcha boy.
This Chrissy Teigen banana situation shut down the internet for 30 minutes. It was virtual Let's Make a Deal meets The Secret. This is how the internet is supposed to work. It's like the old adage goes: "If you want something, tell the universe and then send your assistant to Topanga Canyon to get it for you."
It's especially ironic that Chrissy is the one doing this since a little while back she helped McDonald's celebrate the launch of McDelivery. She is well aware that you can log on to any number of sites to get pretty much anything brought to your doorstep.
I guess brown bananas are a little bit more specific than a Big Mac and large fries, though, so I'll allow it. Of course, three pop-up shops exclusively offering past-it's-prime fruit for the celebrity on the go will probably open in L.A.
Chrissy, God bless her, has been taking this banana stand for a few days now. It started with a more philosophical query:
If I bring 4 perfect bananas to the thai temple today can I take 4 brown bananas from the mini Buddha house offerings? Making banana bread- christine teigen (@chrissyteigen) September 17, 2017
Then came today's request. Followed by modifications that could best be described as a kidnapper's demands:
SERIOUS INQUIRIES ONLY. please send me a photo of u holding the bananas, giving the peace sign- christine teigen (@chrissyteigen) September 21, 2017
just for safety, my assistant asks that u taste a small piece of the banana in front of her before making the trade https://t.co/k7bvlH93rO- christine teigen (@chrissyteigen) September 21, 2017
And finally, the happy ending all of America has been waiting for.
banana submissions are now closed. thank you guys so much I will send the runner ups some banana bread once done- christine teigen (@chrissyteigen) September 21, 2017
There are bananas in the Teigen-Legend house today and bread in the oven. Carb crisis averted! Take us off of Red Alert, Admiral Grapes. We'll all sleep a little bit better tonight.
Follow R. Eric Thomas on Twitter.
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