Danniella Westbrook reveals to Kerry Katona she wrote suicide note to her kids
Former EastEnders actress Danniella Westbrook has revealed that she wrote her kids a suicide note during her lowest moments.
Speaking to Kerry Katona in an interview on Loose Women, the 44-year-old spoke frankly about her battle with mental health and coping with drug addiction – something Katona, 37, has had personal experience with herself after her own mum offered her her first taste of drugs as a child.
‘Everyone thinks my lowest point was when I got seen with a hole in my nose but my lowest point has been the last four years and not having my daughter in my life,’ she confessed, especially since being shunned on Mother’s Day last year.
‘Not having certain things in my life; I haven’t dealt with it the right way. I haven’t dealt with it the adult way. I have just used,’ Danniella spoke honestly about her addictions.
‘I said to them, “I have taken copious amounts of coke, every medicine in the house, drunk alcohol; this, that and the other”,’ she confessed.
Danniella continued, as she recalled two years previously when she was hospitalised: ‘”And I am still waking up – why? Please section me, I am trying to kill myself’”.’
The star even contemplated suicide methods when at her lowest point, and how it’d affect her children: ‘I thought about what could be the thing that could kill me fast enough that won’t give my kids a lot of shame. And it will be an overdose and it will be because everyone will say, “I told you so because she was a coke head”.’
She then opened up about the heartbreaking suicide notes she wrote: ‘I wrote letters to my kids; I’ve got suicide notes from back then and the reason I said is, “so you can have a better life”.’
Kai, Danniella’s 21-year-old son, would be deeply affected, she revealed: ‘He will cry on the phone sometimes and say “do you know what mum, I don’t want to see you die” and there has been times when I have relapsed and I have gone, “I know you don’t want to see me die but I am not helping you”.’
‘It’s hard but I have come through the other side of that and there are still times when I look at him and say, “I am so sorry Kai” and he says, “will you stop saying sorry because you are getting me all down and I am in a good mood”.’
Danniella and Kerry, both former drug addicts, revealed they each had their kids’ names tattooed on their wrists in order to stop them from self-harming, during the revealing chat.
Catch Loose Women every weekday, from 1.30pm, on ITV1.
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