Dawn French jokes that she’d like her funeral hearse to read both ‘legend’ and ‘slut’

Dawn French has joked that she wants to be embalmed and buried in a perspex coffin with the word “slut” written on it.

French appeared on the premiere episode of Kathy Burke’s new podcast, Where There’s a Will, There’s a Wake, released on Tuesday (29 November). The podcast sees Burke asking celebrity guests about their imagined deaths and funerals.

The Vicar of Dibley star, 65, opened up about how she would like her corpse to be presented when she dies.

Speaking about the circumstances behind her death, French said she would like to die “Tommy Cooper-style” on stage.

In 1984, Cooper died of a heart attack in front of millions of television viewers during his act on the Royal Variety show.

French then divulged what her dream funeral procession would look like, which includes a see-through “Barbie” hearse.

She joked: “I’m humble… I’m low-key. I’d like a see-through hearse, a bit like a sort of Barbie hearse, but black.”

French went on to give further details on the design of the hearse, explaining: “Things should be spelled out [on the sides of the hearse]. And I’m torn between this, and perhaps you can help me with this.

“Either it says, like one side it will say something like legend but spelled ‘L e g j i N D.’ Legend. And then on the other side it says, ‘Slut.’”

French added that she “definitely” wants “the horses with the plumes” and “RuPaul in the top hat”.

The actor continued to explain that she would like “a sort of wake behind” made up of “previous lovers and concubines”.

Asked about her dream coffin, she said it would be “raised up upright” and “will be solid gold, obviously”. She compared it to a “sarcophagus” but with a Perspex top “so it is see-through”.

Explaining her reasoning behind the choice, she said: “Because Kathy, what I’d really like if you’ll grant me this, I’d like to be preserved. I’d like to be embalmed. Properly with full makeup. With lashes. In possibly, a vicar outfit.”

“And the perspex front has two holes with my t*** coming through. And if you want, you can rub them for luck. As you enter Cornwall,” she said.

French is currently starring alongside Julian Clary and Alexandra Burke in the pantomime Jack and the Beanstalk at the London Palladium.

‘Where There’s a Will, There’s a Wake’ can be streamed now on all podcast platforms