Devoted Midlothian mum speaks out at 'uncertainty' over daughter's school future
A Midlothian woman says more funding is needed for children with additional needs.
Mum-of-two Rebecca Smith, 28, sent her youngest daughter Eve to Danderhall Nursery with plans to join her big sister in the adjacent primary school next September. However, Rebecca feels there is uncertainty about which school she will end up in.
Eve is three and a half and has microduplication syndrome and suspected autism. Rebecca explained that while it doesn't affect her intellectually, her brain has developed at a slower rate.
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Speaking to Edinburgh Live, the hairdresser said: "Danderhall is a great nursery and primary school. Eve started this year but has really come out of her shell, she loves it! The staff are fantastic. But there will be a discussion to see if she can go to the primary school or it could be suggested that she goes to another school that would be able to give her more support.
"I really want her to go to Danderhall Primary, even in the last six months, to a year, she has really developed. I know some children need that one-to-one and not all schools can provide that, but I don't think Eve will need that, she is growing more and more independent. Nothing has been set in stone yet, and so much can change in a year. She could develop more or she could regress. I'm trying not to think about it, but it is worrying."
Rebecca added: "I think generally there should be more funding for children with additional needs in mainstream schools. Of course, I want what is best for Eve, we all want the best for our children, but I think some kids like being around their friends and some of the special schools are further away too. If there was more funding, more support, then there could be more ASN assistants in schools who know how to work with our kids."
Little Eve has developed into a 'proper little character', and the devoted mum told how she realised that she had to 'let her little baby go' as she grew older.
She said: "Eve has really come out of her shell in recent months. We can see her growing and developing in front of our eyes. She’s had a lot of support from our local teams, like speech and language therapy. Eve has microduplication syndrome, and suspected autism. She used to spend all of her time in her own little world, but I can see her coming out of her bubble.
"The microduplication syndrome doesn’t affect Eve’s intellectual ability, it’s more to do with the age of her brain. When she was one, she was hitting her four-to-five-month milestones. She often couldn't tell us what she needed, or express her emotions. This caused her to lash out and become angry, to the point where I sometimes had to warn other parents and children about playing with her. To her, a meltdown is sometimes her only way of coping.
"Eve is getting much better at handling these emotions, but up until recently, it was becoming impossible to take her out. I couldn’t safely leave her alone.
"We go to the soft play in the local library, it's great there. I used to have to follow her about. Other kids would want to hug her, and because she couldn't speak, I would have to speak for her. It was horrible having to hover, but I had to tell myself, 'Stop thinking about what anyone else thinks, they don't know your circumstances'. Then about six months ago, she was telling me to 'sit over there', she wanted to go off on her own. I knew I had to let her go.
"There was that feeling of 'mum-guilt' because I wanted to hover over her for her own good, or because I was scared about leaving her alone? But I think as mums, deep down you know what's best. I would say if you have that mum guilt feeling, you're probably doing something right."
To help the three-year-old with her meltdowns, Rebecca and her husband George decided they wanted to dedicate a corner of the living room to sensory play. They applied to Family Fund and received a delivery of sensory toys that we’d chosen for Eve.
“This corner calms Eve down so much, but I noticed it really helped Olivia too”, mum Rebecca said, “We suspect Olivia has Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder, like myself, and it has been incredible to watch both girls in their element.
“They have their own space now, and months on, they’ll still play with the toys. Some days Eve will lie in front of the bubble lamp for ages. These toys are such good quality, and we wouldn’t have been able to invest in these if it wasn’t for Family Fund.”
She added: “It’s so nice to know that there are things put in place for families like ours. It seems so silly, because they are just things, just toys, but these ‘things’ have helped us in the smallest, and the biggest ways. These items take the pressure off, and the smallest of positive things can create the biggest of positive movements.”
A Midlothian Council education spokesman said: “Provision for children with Additional Support Needs (ASN) has not been cut at Danderhall Primary School. We have an ASN central team who assess each child referred for consideration of specialist provision and, working with parents, agree whether appropriate supports for that child are best provided in a mainstream class or specialist provision.
"While we agree funding for ASN provision is challenging, this is a national issue and not confined to Midlothian. Indeed, ASN provision is increasing in Midlothian both in terms of opening new services and improving existing supports.”
See more information about Family Fund here.
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