Edinburgh firefighter who hit 'rock bottom' urges other men to ask for help

An Edinburgh firefighter who found himself in a "dark place" is urging other men to speak out when they need help, as he takes on a gruelling challenge.

Maciej Manikowski, 31, felt he reached "rock bottom" after a series of challenges in his life and the end of a long-term relationship. He knew it was time to seek therapy and after coming out the other end Maciej, who lives in Leith, wants more men to ask for help - whether that comes from a friend or a professional.

Looking to raise awareness as well as funds for Movember, he will be taking on a gruelling challenge of climbing Arthur's Seat every day in November. On top of that, he will also spend three days doing the ascent 60 times - signifying the number of men who are lost globally to suicide each hour.

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Speaking to Edinburgh Live, Maciej said: "This year was very difficult for me.

"I went through a lot. Up until the beginning of the year I had never really thought about reaching out for help or asking anyone.

"Having started therapy and asked for help, I've realised how much I've needed it. I realised how important it is to open up.

"I reached a bit of a rock bottom when my relationship broke down, which was mainly because of my unwillingness to look for help. The breakdown in the relationship really caused me to re-evaluate my life, and understand what's important and what I had to do to get better.

"There were a lot of things that happened this year that sparked dark thoughts, but that relationship ending was in a way the kick up the backside that I needed."

Maciej has grown a moustache every November, as part of Movember, though this year he felt urged to do it with purpose. He continued: "I've always supported the cause.

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"But this year I felt I had to do something meaningful. I wanted to do something that matters, and would hopefully help someone."

The 31-year-old feels that since starting therapy, his perspective on life has completely changed. He added: "It's completely shifted everything.

"Having gone through dark days, I can see how important it is to open up and to talk. I want more men to ask for help, and I thought sharing my story might help at least one person do that.

"Going to therapy, or even just speaking to a friend, really makes all the difference. If you're stuck in your own head with intrusive and toxic thoughts, it's never going to end well."

Movember is a charity who works on men's mental health, suicide prevention, prostate cancer and testicular cancer. They launched in 2003, and have funded over a thousand men's health projects around the world.

As the charity highlights, the rate of male suicide is alarmingly high - with three out of four suicides in the UK by men. Maciej believes this is due to a fear of opening up and appearing "weak".

He told us: "Personally, I can tell you that a fear of opening up comes from always wanting to appear as tough and supportive.

"We want people to think we can look after them, and we're not meant to show weakness. People think mental health struggles mean you're weak, and it doesn't.

"Mental health is as important, if not more important, than physical health. We need to realise that it is simply health, it doesn't matter which version."

"Men are sometimes unwilling to understand that it isn't a weakness. If I had an issue with my shoulder or my leg, I'd be more than willing to talk about it - our mental health should be the same."

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Maciej has already started his daily walks up Arthur's Seat, though is yet to take on a gruelling three days where he will make the ascent 60 times. Looking forward to the challenge, he told us: "I started the fundraiser around October time, I joined Movember and set up the page.

"Initially it was just meant to be walking up Arthur's Seat every day of November, and I thought that would be a bit more of a challenge than it is. It's not really pushing me as much as I thought it would.

"I've set myself a goal of raising £2,000 so I thought I should do a bit more. So I'm going to do walk up to the top of Arthur's Seat 60 times in 3 days to mark the 60 men's lives lost to suicide every hour globally.

"I wanted to do something that signifies that number. I haven't felt the effects just yet, the daily walks are quite fun.

"It's different on different days I suppose. This might be a different story next weekend when I take on the bigger challenge!"

You can find Maciej's fundraiser here to help the cause.

If you feel you need to speak with someone, contact NHS 111 on 111 or contact Samaritans on 116 123.