‘I felt guilty and that I didn’t deserve it’: Mel C says she suffered depression and imposter syndrome at start of her Spice Girls career

In a new interview Mel C has spoken about the depression and imposter syndrome she suffered at the start of her career.

After joining the Spice Girls in 1996, Mel C, whose full name is Melanie Chisolm, told The Mirror she exercised obsessively, stopped eating and suffered with depression as she grappled with her new-found fame and the attention it brought.

“I was earning lots of money. I felt guilty and I think I felt maybe I didn’t deserve it and I think all of these things made me put an extraordinary amount of pressure on myself to fit and be what in my head was the idea of perfect, so I did deserve all of the things that were happening to me," she told The Mirror.

Chisholm, who sai an 11-year-old daughter named Scarlet, said that she has only recently come to terms with the status she gained as a member of the world-famous girl band.

“I felt like I had spent many years trying to find myself, who I was when I wasn’t Sporty Spice. Then last year I kind of realised that I am Sporty Spice, what am I trying to find?

“I just kind of feel like I can exhale because I don’t need to search any more, I just need to embrace all of these parts of myself. Like everybody, we are so complex, there are so many sides to us,” the 46-year-old explained.

Chisholm says she began getting help with her depression in 2000 - the same year the band announced their hiatus - and that it was a revelation to receive a diagnosis from her GP.

The singer hopes that by being a vocal advocate for getting help with your mental health issues she can help others.

“You can get better. Everyone deserves to be happy, it is just finding what you need to get to that place,” she told The Mirror.

Mel C was known as Sporty Spice in the Spice Girls, performing alongside Victoria Beckham, Mel B – whose full name is Melanie Brown – Geri Horner and Emma Bunton.

The pop group’s debut album Spice became one of the best-selling albums in history, with the ethos of “girl power” being popularised by the band.

Since the Spice Girls recorded their last studio album, they have reunited minus Beckham for a tour in 2008 and 2019, while the whole band re-formed just once in 2012 for the Olympics Opening Ceremony in London.

Chisholm says that the former band members are now closer than ever, and that the full fivesome met at Horner’s home after lockdown eased earlier this year.

“That was really special and we had a lovely ­afternoon," Chisholm explained.

"We are probably closer now than we have been in a very long time – and that includes Victoria.”

Next year marks 25 years since the band formed, which has led to rumours of a reunion from the band.

Chisholm told The Mirror that Covid-19 will limit their chances of a reunion, but she hopes that they can “get their act together” for a performance to mark the occasion.

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