London Larks: Your weekly dose of capital humour, from James Corden to Cuthbert the Caterpillar

·2-min read
 (PA)
(PA)

Askin’ for a Baskin

They say help comes in unexpected forms, but some forms are more unexpected than others. Carole Baskin, for instance.

Daisy May Cooper enlisted Baskin as an unlikely ally against Penguin this week, using the Netflix star as a messenger in a row over her latest book.

 (PA)
(PA)

Cooper, who claims to have not yet been paid in full for her memoir, called on Baskin to record a video demanding the money.

“You guys are askin’ for a Baskin by not paying Daisy what she’s owed,” Baskin explains succinctly, in a line we will be noting down for all future financial disputes.

Irn-Phew

Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez captured Scottish hearts with her tireless quest for Irn-Bru at COP26 this week.

Upon finally trying the drink, the US congresswoman gushed: “Oh my God, love it, love it. This tastes just like the Latino soda Kola Champagne.”

Nicola Sturgeon even posed for a photo, with both politicians beaming over the can of Scotland’s other national drink as if clutching the Holy Grail itself. (A twenty-first century epic poem, anyone?)

Irn-Bru’s spokesperson added: “It’s phenomenal that Scotland’s ginger nectar has made such a splash with delegates from across the globe.”

Wicked Game

 (PA)
(PA)

“Popular! I know about popular,” exclaims Glinda in the musical Wicked.

Sadly for James Corden, though, these lyrics aren’t quite ringing true at the moment. More than 50,000 people have now signed a petition calling on producers of the new adaptation to make sure Corden is “in no way shape or form […] near the production of Wicked the movie. That’s pretty much it”.

Signatories generously cited their own reasons for contributing, with highlights including “we’ve suffered enough,” and “he must be stopped.”

Caterpillar-gate: Round two

 (PA Media)
(PA Media)

Not ones to melt into the crowd, Aldi have taken another subtle swipe at M&S by featuring Cuthbert the Caterpillar being arrested in the background of their new Christmas advert.

The two supermarkets were locked in a heated legal battle earlier this year over claims that Aldi’s Cuthbert infringed M&S’s Colin the Caterpillar trademark.

The battle of the supermarket caterpillars has resumed – take your seats for the Great British cake off.

Raven a few eyebrows

A Foxtons letting sign outside a property in London (SIPA USA/PA Images)
A Foxtons letting sign outside a property in London (SIPA USA/PA Images)

A Tower of London Beefeater was somewhat bemused to find a letter from Foxtons on his doorstep offering to sell his home.

Spike Abbott shared the letter on Twitter, which promised a “professional opinion of the sales or rental value of your property in the current market” with “no strings attached.”

“Thanks for the very kind offer @foxtons to sell or rent out the 12th century property that HM Tower of London provide me with,” Mr Abbott said.

“However, I think it may raise a few eyebrows when your sign appears outside my house.”

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