Maid of Honor Bails on Wedding After Bride Doesn't Congratulate Her on New Job

The bridesmaid, who shared the story on Reddit, added that the bride "didn't have anything planned yet" months before the 10-person ceremony

A woman who was asked to be the maid of honor at her friend's wedding backed out because her friend didn't congratulate her on a new job. Now, internet users are sounding off about whether or not she's in the wrong for it.

The Reddit user shared her story to the site's popular "Am I the A------ (AITA)" forum on Wednesday, Sept. 11, when she asked others if she was right to back out of her friend's wedding over the incident.

As the anonymous user explained, her friend informed her "months" before that she was getting married in early November, in what was set to be a small ceremony with 10 total people in attendance. She described it as an "elopement kind of thing."

"I say 'wedding' like that [in quotes] in the title because there will be no invites, no 'save the date,' no ceremony, no walk down the isle, just courthouse and dinner (that comes from the bride herself, I'm not guessing anything)," the bridesmaid wrote.

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The potential maid of honor noted that she later was offered a "permanent" government job in Spain, which she had to take an exam for. "This is usually a great opportunity because these positions are for life (well, until you retire) and they can never fire you. In order to apply for these positions, you have to take an exam, and then depending on your years of service to the institution and the score you get on the exam, you can get one of those jobs," she wrote.

After being selected for one of the positions and being required to move cities, the Reddit user wrote that she ultimately wasn't pleased with how her friend — the bride — reacted to her job news.

"When I told my friend this, the only thing she said is 'when are you leaving?? Can you still come to my wedding?' No congratulations, no 'I'm happy for you,' nothing," she recalled. "I must add, two weeks ago I talked to her to know where were we having dinner for her wedding, and she said she didn't have anything planned yet, let alone booked."

Related: Bride 'Livid' After Groom Asks Wedding Band to Leave Mid-Reception When He Discovers the Singer Is His Ex

"Had she told me she had everything booked and that she really needed my RSVP, I would've understood her answer, but in that context, I've decided that if the only thing she cares about is her and her wedding, and she can't be happy for me, I'm not going to the wedding," the original poster concluded.

After the maid of honor asked if she was the "a------" in the situation, the general consensus underneath the post was that she indeed was.

"While your friend’s reaction may have seemed dismissive, it’s possible she was caught up in the stress of wedding planning and didn’t fully process your big news. Weddings, even small ones, can be overwhelming, and she likely values your presence on such an important day," the most-upvoted comment read, adding that the woman "should have communicated how you felt about her response."

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"Friendship is a two-way street, and it’s important to express your feelings rather than make assumptions," the commenter added. "Canceling your role as Maid of Honor because of one comment comes across as self-centered and could hurt your friendship in the long run. Talking it out would have been a better approach."

While one user wrote that the woman was "denigrating" her friend's wedding by "putting it in quotes," another pointed out that she may have been misinterpreting her friend's response to her job news.

"For some weird reason you are interpreting her comment negatively. Her comment could easily be interpreted as 'You are very important to me and I really hope you can still attend an important event to me. You are one of only 10 people invited and I'd really like you be there,'" they wrote. "Congratulations on your new job."

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