Mary Fetherston-Dilke, naval nurse who served in Egypt and Palestine – obituary

Mary Fetherston-Dilke, who has died aged 101, was Matron-in-Chief of Queen Alexandra’s Royal Naval Nursing Service.

The eldest of four children, she was born Mary Stella Percival in Leamington Spa, Warwickshire, on September 21 1918, and grew up at the family home of Maxstoke Castle, a 14th-century moated and fortified manor house which her ancestors had held for Parliament in the Civil War.

In 1918 her father, Beaumont Albany Percival, a doctor in the Colonial Medical Service in Nigeria, succeeded to Maxstoke Castle, and by royal licence assumed the surname of Fetherston-Dilke. Mary’s brothers made their careers in the Royal Navy, while a sister served in the WRNS.

After leaving school at 16, Mary passed her driving test at 17 and in 1936 was presented at Court as a debutante during the brief reign of Edward VIII. Before the outbreak of war, keen to gain her independence, she trained as a nurse at St George’s Hospital, London.

Once qualified, in 1942 she joined the QARNNS. Her wartime appointments were first to the Royal Naval College at its temporary home at Eaton Hall, the country house of the Duke of Westminster, then two years in the 64th General Hospital in Alexandria, Egypt, followed by six months in the WRNS Sick Quarters at Haifa, Palestine.

Postwar she was rapidly promoted, serving at Royal Naval Hospitals at Gosport, Port Edgar, Chatham, Malta and Devonport, and the Sick Quarters at the Royal Marines Depot, Deal.

She specialised as a theatre nurse and many surgeons, including the eminent Surgeon Vice-Admiral Sir James Watt, insisted that she should be at their side in the operating theatre.

In the rank of Matron, Mary Fetherston-Dilke ran the RN Hospitals in Mauritius (1962-63), and Stonehouse, Devonport (1963-64). She was promoted to Matron-in-Chief in 1966, when she made it a principle to interview every candidate for the QARNNS. Retiring in 1970, she left a reputation for being kind, thoughtful, jolly and above all professional.

She was awarded the RRC in 1961, the OStJ in 1966, and made CBE in 1968.

In retirement she ran the Citizens Advice Bureau in Chiswick for many years, becoming known as the “Red Aunt” for her practice of handing out “know-your-rights” leaflets on the street, and for her support of Ken Livingstone as mayor of London.

From the age of 70 she volunteered at the Brompton and the Royal Marsden hospitals, without ever disclosing her own nursing background. She was sceptical of what doctors could do for patients and was generally suspicious of pills.

In her eighties, convalescing from a hip replacement in Southampton General Hospital, she was confronted by a television crew looking for bad news stories. They were taken aback by Mary Fetherston-Dilke’s vigorous defence of the NHS and her high praise for the treatment she was receiving.

She travelled extensively, usually with Joan Woodgate, her predecessor as Matron-in-Chief, with whom she took exhilarating helicopter and small-plane rides including around Mount Everest; well into their late eighties they visited places as diverse as Bhutan, China, Ethiopia, Greenland, Papua New Guinea, Russia and Uzbekistan.

Never married, Mary Fetherston-Dilke was a much-loved aunt, interested in her many nephews and nieces and their children, generous, and often offering wise counsel.

She was a loyal friend and always modest about her achievements, including as an accomplished seamstress (under the tutelage of a royal dressmaker) and an excellent cook. Later she became the family historian of Maxstoke and its occupants.

Mary Fetherston-Dilke, born September 21 1918, died August 23 2020