Mum, 31, dies in her sleep as husband finds her lifeless body in bed after work
A mum who died in her sleep was found lifeless in bed when her husband came home from work. Ruby Lockwood had gone home to sleep after a late shift as a detective.
But when childhood sweetheart Dale Lockwood came home from work, he discovered her unresponsive in her bed. Despite trying to resuscitate her, the 31-year-old could not be saved.
Dale and his family have since been left heartbroken. He said Ruby had 'no symptoms' and had not been feeling unwell.
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Medics later revealed Ruby died from a rare genetic heart condition called sudden arrhythmic death syndrome (SADS) - caused by cardiac arrest. Dad-of-two Dale now hopes to raise awareness of the rare and 'horrendous' condition which took his wife's life without warning.
Ruby had come home to sleep following her late shift as a detective for West Yorkshire Police. Dale, 33, found her when he came home from work as deputy headteacher at a primary school on October 10 last year.
The cause of Ruby’s death was initially inconclusive following a post-mortem examination. But Dale was told in August by the cardiogenetic team at Leeds General Infirmary that she had SADS.
As the condition is hereditary, Dale now fears their children – four-year-old Arthur and one-year-old Winifred – could carry the gene. He said: "It’s horrendous and it wasn’t expected – Ruby wasn’t poorly, she had no symptoms, it was a total, utter shock out of the blue to the point where you still can’t believe it.
"As well as losing your wife, the love of your life and the mother of your children, there’s also the worry that it could happen to your children." Dale said telling Arthur 'mummy had died' was the hardest thing he had to do.
He has been supported by the British Heart Foundation (BHF) in his search for answers and has in turn raised more than £17,000 for the charity. He took on the AJ Bell Great North Run in Newcastle – a half marathon Ruby completed in 2015 – on Sunday, September 8 to raise money for the cause.
Sads is a genetic condition where someone dies suddenly and unexpectedly from a cardiac arrest. It has no clear cause and affects about 500 people in the UK every year, according to the BHF.
Dale hopes to raise awareness of the condition, as well as prompt more routine testing and screenings to catch underlying issues. He said: "I’m trying to make what happened to Ruby count, I’m trying to make it worth something.
"It’s about getting a stronger message out there to ultimately stop it from happening to anyone else – I wouldn’t wish it on anyone." Dale and Ruby met when they were 17 working behind the bar of their local Irish club.
Dale said 'things happened quite naturally' and they 'never looked back'. They married in 2019 before welcoming Arthur in 2020 and Winifred in 2022.
The dad said: "Everybody liked Ruby, she just had such a strong personality and persona, she would light up a room. She was a really vivacious character and just so full of life, she was fantastic at her job and she was an amazing mum and wife."
On the day of her death, Dale said Ruby returned home from work at about 5am. He joined her in their kitchen for 'a catch up, a chat and a laugh' before the pair went about their day.
Dale said his wife’s last words to him as he left for work were "love you". Ruby dropped their children off at nursery and returned home to sleep.
He said: "When I came up the stairs, the bedroom door was open and I could see Ruby on the bed and that’s when I thought something wasn’t right. Her eyes were open and (she) was just half under the covers."
Dale tried to resuscitate Ruby as 'panic' and 'adrenaline' kicked in but he realised 'fairly instantaneously' there was nothing he could do. The dad said: "Because of my job, I’m actually trained in how to speak to children around bereavement – you just never expect to do it with your own children.
"You’ve just got to be really factual, using the term ‘died’, so ‘mummy has died’…as brutal as it sounds you’ve just got to be open and direct. Not comparing it to finding Rubes, because that was horrendous but the shock kicked in then, telling Arthur was just raw emotion and he just sobbed.
"Of all the things I’ve ever done, that will always be the hardest." Dale said not initially knowing how his wife died was difficult.
He said: "I was tortured with thinking "could I have done anything" or "could I have saved her" but not knowing what it is, you don’t have the answers to that."
There is a 50 per cent their children will have the same condition as Ruby. Dale said: "Some signal within Ruby’s system wasn’t working correctly and just stopped that day."
The family will have to wait about eight months for further genetic testing to see if a 'faulty gene' is found in Ruby’s samples, which would then allow their children to be checked.
Recalling the recent AJ Bell Great North Run in Newcastle, Dale said: "Crossing the finish line, it was that jubilation to get across and as soon as I stopped for five minutes and the adrenaline stopped, that’s when it hit me what I had done it for. I had various things for Ruby on me…I actually cut up Ruby’s running vest from 2015 and tied it around my wrist for some inspiration."
He added: "Ruby spent her life, a work career, helping people and she was totally selfless. If by sharing things and raising money makes a difference to one person or one family, that’s enough."
See Dale's JustGiving page here.