Mum's tribute to 'engineer from God' as talented son ends his own life

A bright and talented Cambridge graduate who attended A&E with suicidal thoughts just 10 days before taking his own life did so as a result of his long-term struggle with mental health problems, an inquest has concluded.

Ramy Michael Baxby, 38, known by his middle name, was found unresponsive at his home in Oughtibridge, Sheffield, by a friend on November 19 last year. During a hearing on Wednesday (September 25), Sheffield Medico-Legal Centre heard how Michael had been diagnosed with autism, anxiety, depression and dependent personality disorder.

Michael - who was first diagnosed with depression during his time at Cambridge University - first expressed suicidal ideation to his GP Dr Daniel Sears in 2015 - something which would sadly continue throughout the rest of his life.

Read more: 'Genius' son took his own life after struggle over where he would live

As the inquest continued on Thursday (September 26) Michael’s mother, Tanya Baxby, paid tribute to her “adorable, happy and clever son”, in a statement read to the court by Assistant Coroner Ms Katy Dickinson, she said: “As a child, Michael was an adorable, happy, gorgeous looking, always smiling, cheeky, too clever for his own good, funny, infuriating, loved by everybody, insufferable, witty, irritating, disorganised, a very special little boy.

“Remembering how delightful Michael was in the first half of his life, and the amazing times with him then, makes it even harder to come to terms with the tragedy that unfolded during the second half of his life. We were blessed with just one child, our Michael, but raising this one was like raising half a dozen.

“Michael had many childhood obsessions, like all kids do. He drew us through all his crazes and phases like saving Tigers, Dolphins, everything, as usual, taken to extreme. But one obsession was there to stay - Michael’s life-long passion, his calling, his destiny was aircraft design. He was a born Aeronautical Engineer; there was never a question about his career choices. He was an engineer from God.”

Michael struggled with his mental health throughout the second half of his life, and received several treatments including talking therapies, family therapy and medication. He also had support from a home care service, however his parents believe there were failures in his care.

For a number of years, Michael told medical professionals that he was having thoughts of suicide. Dr Helen Crimlisk, consultant psychiatrist at Sheffield Health and Social Care NHS Foundation Trust, said when she met Michael for a second time on November 10, 2023, there was no “real or immediate” risk to him.

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Later the same day, Michael attended A&E with suicidal thoughts. The inquest heard how Michael did not meet the criteria to be detained under the Mental Health Act and 10 days later, his body was tragically discovered.

Dr Daniel Sears, Michael's GP at Oughtibridge Surgery, added: “He spoke about suicide for a long, long time. Although we always acted on it in a referral, it was difficult to know how much he meant it.”

Medical professionals told the court that despite being offered various treatments, Michael maintained the belief that “the only way his life could go on was if he was to move back in with his parents”. Dr Sears described Michael as being “fixated” on the idea of living with his mother and father, Carl Baxby.

In an emotional statement, Tanya explained the physical and mental impact Michael’s relentless pursuit to live in the family home had on her and her husband - at times, they found him sleeping on their patio, in their garden, or in his car on the driveway.

She claims that Michael was “failed” by mental health services who she believes should have done more to help him. She said: “He took his own life as the direct result of over two decades of sustained profound failure of the Sheffield City Council’s Mental Health and Social Care providers in ‘caring’ for him.

“His tragic death is not only the most devastating loss for us. We firmly believe that Michael was a genius, he had enormous potential which if realised could have made the world a better place. The people who have failed Michael will be able to go home each night and embrace their loved ones. We cannot do this. Until you lose a child, you cannot even comprehend our pain.”

At an earlier pre-inquest hearing, Senior Coroner Mrs Tankya Rawden provisionally engaged article two, which is used for inquests where there is a potential breach of the state's obligation to protect a person's life. Article two was not upheld by Ms Dickinson due to the evidence presented in court.

The coroner concluded that Michael died as a result of suicide. Delivering her verdict, Ms Dickinson said: “Ramy Michael Baxby died on November 19 2023. He suffered from mental illness for many years which led him to take his own life.”

Following the inquest conclusion, Michael’s mother Tanya said: “I made a promise on the day of Michael’s funeral that I will campaign to do all I can to ensure those responsible for the shocking state of care for autistic people in our country are made accountable for their failure.

“This, together with working with Professor Simon-Baron-Cohen of Cambridge University autism research centre, raising funding for his cutting-edge Autism Research, is now my lifelong quest, and the only fitting way for us to honour Michael’s memory, and to ensure that his life was not a complete and utter waste, at least in his death. I will not stop my campaign for as long as I live.”

When life is difficult, Samaritans are here – day or night, 365 days a year. You can call them for free on 116 123, email them at jo@samaritans.org, or visit www.samaritans.org to find your nearest branch.