Ramses and Marissa broke down their relationship's heartbreaking end at the 'Love Is Blind' season 7 reunion
Ramses and Marissa were one of the engaged couples featured on "Love Is Blind" season seven.
They had difficult conversations about their sex life and views on the military.
They didn't make it to the altar — but they broke down the breakup at the season seven reunion.
Warning: Major spoilers through the "Love Is Blind" season seven reunion ahead.
"Love Is Blind" season seven's most candid on-screen couple almost made it to the altar — but ultimately, their relationship ended before they could get there.
Ramses, a 35-year-old program associate at a justice reform nonprofit, and Marissa, a 32-year-old lawyer, hit it off in the pods and eventually got engaged.
When they returned from a post-engagement trip to Mexico, they had some frank discussions while living together. Ramses had strong, anti-imperialist, and critical views of the United States military. And while Marissa shared some of them, as a former service member, she empathized with those serving today.
It was a remarkable conversation for "Love Is Blind," which as Vulture's Kathryn VanArendonk wrote, "has never swerved toward anything as directly political as 'what role should America play on the global stage.'"
Ramses and Marissa's discussion also has significant reach: Seasons of "Love Is Blind" are viewed by millions of people, per Netflix's own engagement numbers. That also means that millions will likely view their heartbreaking split in the season finale, which aired Wednesday.
Here's what we know about what happened to Ramses and Marissa after filming and where they stand today, including what both of them said at the season seven reunion.
Marissa and Ramses started off strong, but didn't make it to the altar
Marissa had connections with both Ramses and another contestant, Bohdan, in the pods. Eventually, she cut off her relationship with Bohdan in favor of pursuing Ramses.
In episode five, Ramses proposed to her. After meeting in person later that episode, producers select the couple as one of the six pairs they'll continue following on a post-engagement trip to Mexico.
Overall, that trip goes smoothly for them. But by episode seven, Ramses and Marissa are back in the real world and differences arise.
The two move in together and begin to discuss their upcoming wedding. They also discuss their opposing views on the United States military: While both share an anti-imperialist critique of the institution, Marissa grew up in the military, served for eight years after college, and says that she supports those who currently serve. She says that she doesn't want Ramses to feel "ashamed" of her service. He confirms that he likely wouldn't want to be with her if she was a reservist.
"I wouldn't, like, want anyone to feel shame about their past," he says. "As long as it's in your past."
The topic comes up again in episode eight, during a conversation with Marissa's friends, and the couple says that they were able to talk through their differences.
In episode nine, Ramses and Marissa meet with Marissa's family. While her siblings approve of the couple, Marissa's mom is skeptical and strongly urges them to get a prenuptial agreement out of concern for Marissa's future assets. Still, Marissa tells Ramses later that her mom hasn't dissuaded her from marrying him.
Later in that episode, however, the two hit another roadblock: They have different timelines for having children. While Ramses prefers to wait four years, Marissa wants to have their first child sooner.
When they begin to discuss contraceptive options, they find they're at another impasse. Marissa doesn't want to go on birth control, but Ramses says that having sex with a condom isn't as pleasurable.
"Sex is supposed to be, like, mutually enjoyable. That's not something that guys ever have the pressure of having to think about," he says.
"Yeah, well, here's the pressure. I'm not going to go on birth control," Marissa replied.
"Sounds good, baby. We need to do what we need to do, but I need the sex to be enjoyable," he says.
In episodes 10 and 11, Ramses and Marissa work through some doubts about their marriage, with Ramses telling Marissa he wants a certain level of physical intimacy. After a boat date, they both feel confident.
However, in the season finale, Ramses tells Marissa that he was worried his feelings were leading him to an incorrect decision. Ultimately, he says that he's worried about their energies "coexisting in the same space," and that he doesn't feel confident about getting married.
"I think you're making a mistake. I think this is a big mistake," Marissa tells him. "I believe that wholeheartedly. And I — I can't convince you otherwise. Like, I don't know, but I just know this is not right. Like, this is not right. This is like the worst heartbreak I've ever experienced. It hurts so bad."
In a confessional, Marissa expresses confusion that Ramses had been excited for their wedding only days before he decided to call it off.
Ramses and Marissa didn't get back together after filming
Marissa and Ramses posted fondly about their time on "Love Is Blind" on social media leading up to the finale. They also still follow each other on Instagram.
Marissa has also posted about her and Ramses' discussion about her military service on social media, sharing articles and other social media posts on her Instagram story. In one TikTok video, she joked that her service was singing the song "I'll Make a Man Out of You" from the Disney movie "Mulan."
"Navigating different views with your partner can be challenging, but I'm proud of how much I've grown in my beliefs. I'm also grateful that Ramses and I were able to create space for each other to express ourselves openly," she wrote in the caption.
She also shared photos from the Mexico trip on Instagram, reminiscing about her time with Ramses there — even a date where she got seasick.
"We had to end the date early, and I felt awful knowing how much he'd been looking forward to it," she continued. "But instead of being upset, he was beyond caring, making sure I was okay every step of the way. His love and support in that moment meant the world to me."
In an interview published the day the finale aired on Netflix, Marissa told Glamour that she sensed that her relationship with Ramses was coming to an end after a conversation he had with a friend two days before their breakup. During the conversation, Ramses said he realized how much he had hurt his ex-wife, and in the days following, she said that he was "in a different mood."
Marissa said that she told Ramses that she was comfortable pushing the wedding to pursue a relationship, moving back to their separate residences and just dating without the pressure. She said, however, that he wasn't amenable to that. She said it took her six months to recover from the breakup, and she saw Ramses several times.
She asked him in February or March if he was interested in getting back together, and he told her no.
Ramses did not immediately respond to a request for comment.
After that point, they stopped communicating, and at the time of the interview, Marissa said she was apprehensive about seeing him at the reunion.
"I think it'll be very difficult to see him, but I think I'll make it through," she told Glamour. "I think it will be emotional because I still have a lot of love for him. I don't think he has a lot of maliciousness in him."
Marissa also spoke about the season seven finale in a video uploaded to TikTok. In it, she defended the way that she approached the breakup conversation with Ramses, saying that asking someone if they're certain in their intentions isn't "begging."
On the day the finale premiered, Marissa was set to host a Q&A with Bohdan, her fellow season seven cast mate with whom she formed a connection in the pods, at Metrobar in Washington, DC.
Marissa and Ramses discussed their breakup at the reunion
At the season seven reunion, Marissa said that watching her breakup with Ramses "felt like my heart was breaking all over again." Ramses, who hadn't seen Marissa's full reaction, said that it was "difficult" for him to watch the show.
Ramses says that as filming progressed, he started to realize that there was a gap in their energy that he hadn't noticed in the pods.
"There was one day where I think it just really hit home for me, and I realized and recognized that if I move forward with Marissa, every day I would be in a place where I would feel exhausted and overwhelmed," he said. "I don't want to change who she is. She deserves a person and a love that will embrace who she is fully, as she is. I just felt that that person couldn't be me."
Marissa's mother Vanessa was also at the reunion. She said that she attempted to speak with Ramses after he called off the engagement, but ultimately was "thankful" Ramses called off the engagement because Marissa would have "carried" their relationship.
Ramses said that his regret from the experience was not being "forthcoming" with Marissa about his concerns. He said that he saw a future for the two of them, but didn't realize that it wasn't going to work out until close to the end of the experience.
Ramses also said that he didn't attempt to "present Marissa with an ultimatum" with regard to contraception, referencing their discussion about condoms and hormonal birth control on the show.
"She had very valid reasons as to why she didn't want to use hormonal contraception. I'm well aware of the effects it has on a woman's body, and so I would never try to force that upon her," he said.
On Thursday, after the reunion aired, Marissa posted a statement on Instagram saying that she lives as her "authentic self" each day, and sometimes makes mistakes.
"At the reunion, I came without resentment toward Ramses or anyone else," she wrote. "For those who expected me to 'go off,' I know that I will always handle things my way. We've had many conversations since our breakup, and I wish him well."
Read the original article on Business Insider