The This Morning host lost her sister Julia Johnson took her own life aged 62 in June 2019 after battling depression for many years.
Langsford, 60, told Best magazine: “It seemed wrong to be cheery on screen, when, inside, my heart was breaking.”
The Loose Women presenter revealed during her time off after losing her sister she spent a month, “crying, screaming and sobbing,” and had, “no motivation or desire,” to be in the public eye.
But her TV presenter husband Eamonn Holmes, 60, persuaded her to go back to work in her sister’s memory.
She revealed: “Eamonn pointed out that he was, in effect, losing not one, but two of the most precious people in his life - Julia and me. He showed me how I had so much to live for in Julia's memory – and beyond.
“He pleaded with me not to let it win, by ruining everything I had achieved – and still had to celebrate.”
Shortly after she did return to work, Langsford had to leave the This Morning set briefly, in tears, during a phone-in about depression and anxiety in August last year.
Holmes told viewers “Obviously this has featured in Ruth’s life. She’s upset now and she’s had to leave the studio because of her sister who was a chronic depressive and no matter what help or medication was there, it didn’t seem to make much difference.”
Langsford spoke publicly about her sister’s death for the first time on This Morning in February this year, during a discussion about suicide.
She told psychologist Emma Kenny, “This happened in my family. I remember my shock at that. It's the questions it leaves the families - 'I should have gone round. I should have phoned. I was going to go round. I was going to phone. Maybe I should have stayed longer.”
“You are left with the 'what ifs'.”
My lovely Sis Julia has sadly died after a very long illness. My heart is completely broken. She was the kindest and most gentle soul and I will miss her forever. As I am sure you will appreciate I need to take time to grieve with my family. Thank you for your understanding. pic.twitter.com/o6jMtIqMg4— Ruth Langsford (@RuthieeL) June 20, 2019
Announcing her sister’s death on Twitter last year Langsford said: “My lovely Sis Julia has sadly died after a very long illness. My heart is completely broken. She was the kindest and most gentle soul and I will miss her forever. As I am sure you will appreciate I need to take time to grieve with my family. Thank you for your understanding.”
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