From Strictly kisses to trans women in prisons... is anyone else unsure where they stand these days?

Have you any idea how exhausting it is to live your life sitting permanently bang slap in the middle of just about any debate? To never be able to see anything in either black or white, to view everything through some kind of Farrow and Ball grey colour chart ranging from, Smokers Circulation to London Cement (which incidentally is the colour of my foundation).

Because this is my reality. Whilst everyone around me gets furious about so many things, most of the time, I cannot decide whether I’m blisteringly angry, mildly annoyed or just a teeny bit pissed off. Sometimes I find myself thinking, “well actually this isn’t something I can get my knickers in a twist over”.

Take Eugenie’s wedding, I just couldn’t muster up the rage that a lot of people genuinely felt over the spectacle. Yes, it was over the top, but I don’t blame the bride. She looked pretty, her groom seemed delighted, Beatrice read an oddly inappropriate speech, but it was done with such sweetness and obvious love for her sister that I couldn’t get worked up enough to sneer at it. And wasn’t it great to see Fergie? Fist bumping and galumphing around like it was the Eighties again. So although it was a silly waste of money, it lit up an otherwise dull week and to top hat it all off Cara Delevingne showed us how to scene steal at a wedding without resorting to wearing a white dress.

So that’s that one sorted, let’s move onto Seann and Katya. Again I am just not prepared to take sides here, yes it was awful for everyone involved, but if you’ve been around comedy for as long as I have then you’d know not to underestimate the sexiness of the wayward male stand up.

I have seen the plainest of funny men pull the most beautiful women. OK, so Seann behaved like a bit of a s***, but did he really come in a box with “Trust me, I’m your perfect boyfriend” stamped all over it. I think not.

Yes, his ex-girlfriend had every right to be livid and I respect her reaction, but drunken snogging to me does not constitute domestic violence and when some insinuate it does, it must cast shudders of unfounded fear around every workplace in the land.

Do you know what I think? I think sometimes people behave really badly and they are really sorry, but they may well do it again. Sadly some people aren’t entirely trustworthy. People cheat in all kinds of ways, some will take your money and some will stamp on your heart.

OK, that’s that one dealt with, let’s get onto the trans debate which seems to be causing so much upset and anger on social media, some of which has got really vicious.

Now here I am confused, on the one hand, I have total sympathy with anyone born into the wrong gender and believe wholeheartedly they have every right to live out their life in the sex of their choice. But on the other hand I don’t think a trans woman who has not undergone gender reassignment surgery and has a record of sexual violence against women should be allowed to roam freely in a female prison.

But then again, in the case of Karen White, it was her violence rather than her gender identification that needed segregating.

To suspect all trans people of having an ulterior motive is bonkers. Someone recently asked whether I’d mind if a trans woman gave me a smear test? Well no, to be honest, because I would trust them in their professional capacity to simply get on with the job. The only thing I care about is that they are a properly trained health practitioner. But I also understand that many women don’t share this attitude, so yet again my sympathies are split.

Do you see? This is what happens to me all the time, apart from Brexit, which I am 100 per cent against, I can be a bit fluid when it comes to taking sides.

Just when I think I’ve made my mind up about something, the voice of doubt whispers “yes but on the other hand” and I’m turning in circles again, trying to weigh up conflicting opinions, feeling out of my depth and not daring to chip in or ask questions in case I say something stupid and the entire world of Twitter lands on my head.

So, I for one thought Jo Brand had a fair point last week when she said many women are wary of entering feminist debates over transgender issues because they are frightened of the reaction.

Phew, so it’s not just me that feels unconfident about tackling the tricky subjects. I reckon there’s loads of us and if everyone just stopped shouting for a moment we might realise that compassion is key, and that possibly, some of the answers lie somewhere in the middle?