US 21-year-old "never wanting a daughter" opts to pay for IVF to have a boy

A mum who has had three baby girls despite "never wanting a daughter" says she's opting for IVF for her next child - so she can choose to have a boy. Amber Castle, 21, has always dreamed of having a son, and "cried for weeks" after finding out her most recent baby was a girl. She loves her three girls but admits she "never wanted a daughter". The stay-at-home mum is so determined to make her dream come true she's going to spend $15,000 on gender selection IVF. The social media influencer opened up about her intentions online and was inundated with "hundreds of thousands" of hateful comments. But Amber, from Ulster County, New York, USA said it has only made her more determined. She said: "I always saw myself with one or two kids, but after getting the same gender over and over, we tried again. "I couldn't imagine going through this lifetime without a son, something I dreamed of since being a child." The mum, who had a miscarriage, added: "Even after experiencing a loss, knowing how painful it is, wishing it wasn't happening to you, we're still going for IVF. "Babies are blessings, no doubt, I just can't imagine myself without a son and trying a fourth time with a 50/50 chance doesn't sound right." Amber and her boyfriend Skilar Ryan, 20, have been together since they were in middle school, and started trying for their first baby when they were both only 16. She said: "There was something about the both of us, we just knew this was it, no 'what if's. "Personally, I believe life and experience age you. "To anyone else we were just some 16-year-olds, but for me, at 16, I wasn't mentally 16. "I'm often described as 'an old soul' and I agree." However, both the teens' families were not supportive of their idea to start a family, and tried to encourage them to terminate the pregnancy. But the couple were steadfast in their decision, and welcomed Jaylee Nevaeh Ryan, four, on September 21 2017 - just one month after Amber turned 17. Their second child, one-year-old Brooklynn Mae Ryan, was born on April 24 2020, but then sadly suffered a pregnancy loss February this year. "I never found out the gender of our loss, although I believe it would've been another girl," said Amber. Amber and contracting business manager Skilar tried again naturally, and Amber found out she was pregnant around March 20. She said: "When I first found out I was pregnant again, I was gonna keep the gender a surprise, so ultimately I wouldn't be upset my whole pregnancy. "But I was convinced she was gonna be our boy, I even paid for a psychic reading who told me she'd be a boy. "So I did a blood test and when the results came back female, I remember just crying. "I was so upset. I cried for weeks. "I was so sold this was it, so when that came crashing down on me I just felt like something was stolen from me. "Every ultrasound I had them recheck, I read story after story of people being told it was one gender and it ended up being another. "I read the stories so often that I came to believe maybe that was my circumstance also - but, she was born a girl." Their rainbow baby River Souline Ryan was born on October 30 this year, but the stay-at-home mum is still determined to have a son. So much so, she's willing to spend up to $15,000 on a cycle of IVF in order to make sure of it. She said: "I never wanted a daughter - I come from a family of mainly all girls, I have two brothers and five sisters. "One of my brothers is the oldest and one of them is the youngest, so I never had that brother connection people talk about. "I think this plays a huge role in why I never wanted a daughter." As Amber is only two weeks postpartum, she doesn't plan on having the IVF for at least a few years, and also knows she will have to save up to afford it. She posted a video about her decision to opt for gender selection IVF online, which received mixed responses. She said: "Hundreds of thousands of people left mean, vile comments. "It's not your kid, nor your money, there's no shortage of IVF. "Me using it won't stop the next person, it's there for anyone. "I find this better than trying seven plus times for a boy." She says she gets comments like 'you don't deserve kids', 'you don't appreciate the kids you have' and 'some people would kill for one kid and here you are paying for a certain gender'. Trolls even tell her that her future son will be transgender as a result of her choice. But Amber does sympathise with those who are struggling to have children naturally. She said: "I feel for them, I do. "But, end of the day, others' infertility struggles aren't my burden. "If there was a shortage I wouldn't do it, but there's not and if you can pay, you can get it." She also does receive support from her followers, who appreciate her honesty, and wishes to continue normalizing gender disappointment. Amber said: "After posting about my gender disappointment with my girls, hundreds of people told me I was an awful person. "But hundreds of people also told me they felt the same way. "I found that comforting and decided maybe sharing my story would comfort others thinking of doing the same thing." The social media influencer documented her most recent pregnancy on her TikTok, @itsambaslife, which has brought in a following of over 130,000.

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