West Lothian man says others go from 'crying to laughing' at crucial meet-up
A West Lothian man who helps run a weekly meet-up wants those struggling in the area to know there is a 'safe and welcoming' space for them.
Andy Beattie, who is a facilitator of the Broxburn branch of Andy's Man Club, told the Daily Record he wants men in the area to 'see there is a club that might just be next door'.
He said: "I’ve been lucky that I’ve been going to the clubs almost three years and facilitated for over a year.
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"I have seen men broken and in tears, not knowing where to turn for help. These men usually return to the club and I see them gradually improving each week and getting their confidence back slowly.
"Knowing there is a place they can talk without being judged is a huge help. We have had guys who struggled leaving their own home get back in the car and drive a significant distance.
"This is what keeps us doing what we do. You see the affect it has on improving men’s mental health.
"And you’ve got to remember that, as facilitators, we were that man walking scared to a club for the first night with a huge weight on his shoulders Everyone on the group has some struggle or indeed has had one.
"As facilitators we still go to keep our mental health good too. This is helped by helping others too.
"It’s such a great feeling. All of our facilitators do what we do because we see how it helped them and now they would like to help others.”
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Andy’s Man Club takes its name from Andrew Roberts, a man who sadly took his own life aged 23 in early 2016. Andy was a doting father, son, brother, grandson, nephew, cousin and friend, and was just 23 years old when he was taken away by suicide, sadly and tragically without warning.
His loved ones set up the Andy’s Man Club movement in his memory. Andy said numbers do vary from week to week depending on the time of the year, and sadly, as we come into the darker months of winter and towards Christmas, the clubs tend to see numbers rise.
He said: "Christmas last year was the highest number at Broxburn which was 39 and required us to use two rooms at the club as especially if you have social anxiety, this number in one room can be too much.
"As the group grows we seek new venues or indeed additional rooms."
Andy continued: "In September this year myself and three other volunteer facilitators decided to open a new club to help take the pressure off Broxburn.
"Ficos in Kirkliston generously offered us a space in the restaurant free of charge as they are closed Mondays.
"I know it’s technically Edinburgh but it’s in the cusp of West Lothian. Some of the men who went to Broxburn stayed in Kirkliston or Winchburgh area so it was easier to get there. Another reason was due to the numbers who sadly take their own lives on the Forth Road Bridge.
"I would say on average at each West Lothian club there must be around 20 men attend each one just now which is brilliant."
Andy added: "I have seen a lot of men come through the doors and I see huge change in them as the weeks progress.
"Men leaving the house, going on holiday again, men realising the aren’t alone in their thoughts. Men who have previously attempted to take their own life and thankfully failed.
"Seeing men laugh who I remember came in crying is what motivates me and every one of us facilitators."
Any man aged 18 and over can go to andysmanclub.co.uk and put their location in and it will let them know where the closest club is.
They can go to any club. It doesn’t matter where they live.
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The clubs don’t require you to register, be referred or indeed book a space. Just turn up at any one of the clubs for a 7pm start (doors normally open around 6.30).
You will be greeted by one of the facilitators who will show you where to go. Help yourself to tea/coffee and biscuits, all provided free of charge, then grab a seat.
Anything the men say (or indeed choose not to say) is confidential and won’t leave the room. Andy continued: "We don’t judge and we also avoid talking about divisive subjects.
"This is all said at the rules announcement at the start. Men don’t have to talk if they don’t want to.
"They can just listen if they like. The only days the clubs are closed is English bank holidays, where we usually organise a social event like bowling or crazy golf, these are at a cost as it’s outwith the clubs.”
Search Andy’s Club on Facebook or visit andysmanclub.co.uk.
If you've been affected by this article, Samaritans are available to call 24 hours a day on 116 123. You can also find help on their website here.