Why you should invest in a bum bag this festival season

There’s a reason so-called festival fashion is blamed for adding to the planet’s garbage woes: most of it is minging.

Certainly, it is true of the novelty sunglasses, plastic printed ponchos and heinous flower crowns that have been littering the fields of Worthy Farm for the best part of two decades. But the times they are a- changin’ — or so Mr Dylan might have noted were he on this year’s Glastonbury line-up — as those with plans to muck about in mud this summer look to practical wardrobe solutions. Hurrah.

The bum bag, arguably the geekiest accessory of all time, is a leader in this field, with more and more of us looking to the style to see us through this summer and many more. Proof of its appeal has been noted by Hunter — the welly boot brand turned all-weatherwear crackerjack — which struggles to keep its classic original style in stock. It also does a roaring trade in its packable version, with sales increasing 93 per cent since last year, a stat that stands as proof of our demand for sensible style.

This bum bag revival (not since a school trip to Holland in 1992 have I been so on board with the style) is all about practicality, with the most appealing versions water-resistant inside and out, to prevent waterlogged iPhones and soggy spare socks. The best bums around come in decidedly neutral colourways to promote maximum value per wear — after all, the bum bag should be a quietly chic addition to your look, not a big screaming statement.

It’s this discretion that sets it apart from the belt bag trends that have been growing among the Insta set for some seasons. While a belt bag is an accessory, usually leather, that’s designed to be worn strapped to your waist like a trophy, the bum bag is more casually cool.

The fact that Miuccia Prada is on board with the outdoorsy interpretation — her nylon incarnation is in favour with sartorialists across the globe — only adds to its appeal.

Of course, how you wear yours is down to you. For the conventional it’s a straightforward affair with the time-honoured round-the-waist method, favoured by geography teachers, the only solution. But a creative cross-body approach is also popular, particularly with the more youthful bum bag owner — see Gigi Hadid and two-thirds of the Jonas brothers. Other enthusiasts include Elizabeth Olsen, who is regularly spotted in a classic coral style, and Lily Allen, who likes to layer hers over a trench coat.

To locate the hands-free handbag of your dreams see Hunter, which also does belt-style versions in a host of colours. K Way’s large styles in classic navy and orange are worth a look. There’s also EastPak, whose best-selling style costs £27.

On the matter of what to wear with your bum bag on the festival field, I’d advise against teaming it with that pink boiler suit you’re dying to bust out. Not least because trips to the toilet will be a veritable disaster.

You have been warned.