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3 subtle ways your mind is telling you that you're in the wrong relationship

3 subtle ways your mind is telling you that you're in the wrong relationship
a woman looking doubtful with her partner
Vladimir Godnik/Getty Images
  • An unhealthy relationship can take a toll on your mental health in subtle ways.

  • A licensed counselor shared some signs your mind is telling you you're in the wrong relationship.

  • She said people in these relationships avoid texting their partners and can't picture their future together.

When you're in the wrong relationship or unhappy in your relationship your body can show physical signs, from stomach aches to itchy skin.

But there are also emotional cues to listen to, Suzanne Degges-White, a licensed counselor and professor at Northern Illinois University, told Business Insider.

She said that when you're truly happy in a partnership, "you're more likely to experience feelings of gratitude for the person you're with" and feel actively excited to build a life together.

But when you're not, Degges-White said that you can experience symptoms of anxiety or depression that can show up in subtle ways. She shared three clues that your mind is telling you that you're in the wrong relationship, even if you don't realize it.

1. You delay going home

Whether you live together or have plans to meet up at their place, Degges-White said that when you're in a healthy relationship, you look forward to seeing your partner.

But if you're with someone who doesn't make you feel great, "you look for reasons that you can delay spending time with that person," she said.

"It's a dread sometimes about being around that person or anxiety about how they're going to react," Degges-White said.

If they have an explosive temper, for example, it can feel like walking on eggshells when you're in the same space.

You might find small excuses to avoid going home, like working late or seeing friends instead.

2. You avoid texting back

Like avoiding meeting up in person, dodging texts can be a big sign of discomfort in a relationship, Degges-White said.

If you find yourself frequently apologizing for missing their text (when in fact, you did see it and just didn't respond), she said your intuition is trying to tell you something.

Degges-White said that you could be in a bad relationship "when you find yourself engaged in self-protection, avoidance behaviors."

3. You can't picture your future

Degges-White said that when you're in a fulfilling relationship, "you feel hopeful about the future — your focus is on what's coming next versus mistakes you've made."

This could mean fantasizing about the next step in your relationship, from moving in together to getting married. Even if it's just daydreaming, your partner is in those dreams with you.

But if your partner is bringing you down, she said you can feel helpless and hopeless, fixated on red flags you might have missed. You avoid thinking about what the next steps of your life together could look like because you're genuinely not looking forward to it.

Read the original article on Business Insider