Close this content

27 Wedding Crashers Quotes That Still Make Me Laugh

Eric Eisenberg

29 June 2024 at 8:00 pm

Several years after it was released, it's still hilarious.

“You shut your mouth when you’re talking to me!”

“We lost a lot of good men out there.” “Playing for the Yankees?”

“He lived with mother until he was 40! She tried to poison his oatmeal!”

“I happen to know everything there is to know about maple syrup. I love maple syrup. I love maple syrup on pancakes; I love it on pizza. I love to take a little bit and put it in my hair when I’ve had a rough week. What do you think holds it up, slick?”

“Grow up, Peter Pan! Count Chocula!”

“Whatever! Make me a bicycle, clown!”

“I always knew my first time would be on a beach!”

“I don’t think you’re appreciating the urgency here. Not only is she a virgin, she’s totally off the reservation! I’m terrified of this broad”

“Oh please. You and I both know I’m a phenomenal dancer. Now I know you’re lying through your teeth. You’ll do anything to get me to go on this thing. Even if I have to walk into the lion’s den.”

“She took me below deck for forty-five minutes. I have no bodily fluids left in me.”

“I’m not even going to say it, but you know I’m upset.”

“That’s what we call a sack lunch! Nomnomnomnomnom.”

“Yeah! Crabcakes and Football. That's what Maryland does!”

“If I had any air in my lungs, I’d scream at you.”

“Gloria, please. I'm exhausted. I've had a very long day... my leg's cut and bleeding. I'm really not in the mood for this.”

“Don’t ever leave me. Because I’d find you!”

“Pervert!”

“Hey, what were they like anyway? They looked pretty good, are they real? Are they built for speed or comfort? What'd you do with them? Motorboat? You play the motorboat?”

“I’m a little too traumatized to have a scone.”

“I'm gonna go see Dr. Finklestein and I'm gonna tell him we have a whole new bag of issues. We can forget about mom for a while.”

“I mean like, hunt a human being right now, ‘Most Dangerous Game.’ Like a worthy adversary. Not a human being that's armed, but a clever, clever, human being who knows the jungle. Or the woods.”

“I hope you flip your bike over and knock your two front teeth out! You leave me in the trenches taking grenades, John!”

“Maybe there's something about me that I'm a little cuckoo. I know it's a surprise, I know it's not on the surface. I mean, I had an imaginary friend when I was kid, and his name was Shiloh! We used to play checkers with each other every day, and bless his heart, Shiloh would always let me win!”

“The painting was a gift, Todd. I'm taking it with me.”

“She hasn't returned your phone calls, she hasn't responded to any of your letters, she didn't respond to the candygram. God knows what happened to the kitten you got for her. 'Cause she didn't keep it, and I know you're not raising the thing. I think it's very obvious at this juncture that she just flat out does not wanna see you.”

“Listen, I’m getting married.” “Get out.”

“I almost nunchucked you. You don’t even realize.”

Several years after it was released, it's still hilarious.

In the 2000s, there was no bigger brand in comedy than what was being delivered by the Frat Pack (Ben Stiller, Owen Wilson, Luke Wilson, Will Ferrell, Steve Carell, Jack Black, and Vince Vaughn), and Wedding Crashers is one of the greatest examples of that era. Years after its release, it remains as funny as ever – due both to a terrific script and amazing performances – and we’ve put together this feature celebrating the special lines that are funny no matter how many times you watch the movie.

New Line Cinema

Several years after it was released, Wedding Crashers is still hilarious.

Total Film
The 25 best '80s movies
During the two-term presidency of Ronald Reagan, the 1980s became a time characterized by rampant consumerism, materialism, and globalization via rapidly evolving technology. With its moving score by John Barry and powerhouse leads in both Reeve and Seymour, Somewhere in Time wrote the playbook on what it means to feel so far away from your destined soulmate.
INSIDER
Fertility benefits are a must for attracting millennial talent, even in industries other than tech
Previously a luxury for tech workers, fertility benefits are now more common across industries, according to benefits providers Progyny and Carrot.
The Guardian
Why Bronski Beat’s anthem of gay culture resonates 40 years on
What it is about the the haunting classic, Smalltown Boy, that still compels teens to join older generations on the dancefloor?
People
Eva Amurri Claps Back at Critics 'Scandalized' by Her Breasts in Bustier Wedding Dress: See Her Response
Susan Sarandon's daughter married chef Ian Hock on June 29
BuzzFeed
18 Life-Altering, "Should've Known Better" Errors Adults Made In Their 30s Or Later
"Desperate for a new love life, I talked to him for months online and on the phone. One day, he asked me for $1,000. He asked to get directly into my bank account to transfer the money to where it needed to go. I ended up broke with zero in the bank..."
Hello!
Jeremy Clarkson plagued by 'dead rats' at his latest property purchase
Clarkson's Farm star Jeremy Clarkson added to is property empire with a Cotswolds pub purchase – but it's not going well so far
BuzzFeed
17 Kids Of Sex Workers Confessed What Their Lives Were Reallyyyy Like, And It's A Lot To Handle
A lot goes on behind closed doors.
People
All About Audrey Hepburn's Iconic Tea-Length Wedding Dress (Which Might Have Been Off the Rack!)
Audrey Hepburn wore a tea-length dress with puff sleeves for her 1954 nuptials to Mel Ferrer
OK! Magazine
Princess Diana's niece Lady Kitty Spencer finally reveals baby daughter's name
Lady Kitty Spencer has finally revealed the unique name she's chosen for her baby daughter in a sweet new post on Instagram, as royal fans gush over the 'beautiful' moniker
Manchester Evening News
Baby dies at property with police investigation underway
Emergency services, including an air ambulance, raced to the scene yesterday
People
Newly Single Bethenny Frankel Sizzles in White Swimsuit and Heels
The former reality star is back on the market and showing off her sultry summer style!
Cover Media
Kiefer Sutherland reveals estrangement from dad Donald
Kiefer Sutherland has revealed he didn't properly get to know his late father Donald Sutherland until he was 15. The 24 star's parents separated when he was a toddler, and for the first decade and a half of his life, he didn't have a relationship with his father, who died on 20 June at the age of 88. "Me and my dad really got to know each other after I left home at 15," the actor told The Sunday Times. "My parents split when I was three and my mum, sister and I moved to Canada," he shared. "I di
Hello!
Jamie Oliver causes a stir with unseen photos from lavish Las Vegas vow renewal
Jamie Oliver delighted fans at the weekend when he shared a series of unseen photos from his lavish Las Vegas vow renewal with wife Jools. Discover more here...
People
Spice Girls' Mel C Spotted Holding Hands with Mystery Man at Glastonbury Festival
The Spice Girl was photographed strolling through the annual music festival and holding hands with a mystery man on June 29
Hello!
Princess Beatrice is glowing as she rocks out at Kings of Leon concert with husband Edoardo
Princess Beatrice was the picture of royal delight as she enjoyed a sensational night at Hyde Park, grooving to Kings of Leon's electrifying performance. See details.
BuzzFeed
"A Year And A Half Later, She Was Dead": 29 People On The "Incident" That Tore Their Friend Group Apart
"My ex (who I am still good friends with) always said he was creepy…she was right."
The Independent
Reddit users don’t hold back over husband’s ‘problematic’ excuse for missing wedding anniversary
‘You essentially told both of them their feelings don’t matter as much as your sister’s’
BuzzFeed
People Are Sharing The Most Unexpected Thing That Came Out When They Did Family Therapy
"I was shocked at how the truths I’d been told for years were not true."
People
Celebrity Kids Who Dropped Their Famous Last Names
From Shiloh Jolie to Elle King, see the celebrity kids see who decided to forgo their famous parents' last names
The Independent
Chris Pratt and Katherine Schwarzenegger are reportedly expecting third baby
Pratt and Schwarzenegger are already parents to daughters Lyla and Eloise