Derby cemetery so overgrown daughters had to stop ceremony to bury mum's ashes

The distraught daughters of a Derby woman have hit out after the family grave was left covered in undergrowth. Along with other nearby graves, it has become part of a thicket of trees, brambles and holly - one of many similar overgrown areas - in Nottingham Road Cemetery, which is run by Derby City Council.

Felicity and Elizabeth Bowring were left shocked after arriving at the cemetery with an undertaker and celebrant to bury the ashes of their mother, Irene Bowring, in her parents' grave to find it had not been prepared and was covered in brambles. Felicity, who lives in Somerset and frequently works in the USA, said that her late mother's dearest wish had been to be buried in the same grave as her parents.

She said: "Mum died in late September, aged 95, and she expressed the wish to be cremated but her ashes brought back to Derby to be with her parents. So my sister and I set about arranging for the ceremony to take place on November 4.

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"But when we arrived, we couldn't even see the grave as it was buried under brambles along with about 12 other graves. A surprised grave digger came along to help and managed to clear some of the brambles and started to cut a square in what he assumed was the grave area.

"It was so upsetting to think that we would leave mum's ashes in such a wild and abandoned area without it being tidied up, that we decided to put a halt to the proceedings and take the ashes away again. We want to put a headstone on the grave with mum's name also on it but cannot imagine how it would stay clear of brambles in the area's current state.

"This situation has not happened overnight and its not just of concern to us but there is a group of graves that have been allowed to be absorbed by nature with no-one doing anything about it. And there are many other similar overgrown areas that have been left to nature swallowing up graves. It is not right."

The two sisters have been trying to rearrange the interment but have not been told when the area can be cleared. A tearful Felicity said: "There has been a lot of emails exchanged but it seems that this situation is not a priority for the cemetery staff, as they are too busy with large numbers of new burials.

"We have been told we can have an update in spring and in the meantime see if any voluntary groups can help out, as anything the cemetery could do will take several months. This is not a case of an overgrown grave that has not been tended, its complete area that has not been kept clear over many years."

Elizabeth shared a response to one of her emails from a cemetery official, who wrote: "I am sure you can tell this overgrowth has been in the area for many years and never been addressed. This is because the cemetery resources are not sufficient for such a task and our priority is grave preparation.

"The grounds maintenance department have their resources cut every year which does not enable such works to be addressed. We are unfortunately at a stage where we clear overgrowth to enable a burial, we do not have the resources to clear the adjacent area."

Felicity added: "I feel that we have been treated in a rather rude, condescending and uncaring way. It was very upsetting on the day of the interment and it has continued to be an issue, which is no way to mourn our mum and it's hard to understand why we treat our dead lie this. We have been left in limbo and don't really know when we will be able bury my mum's ashes. Everyone deserves respect."

Mrs Bowring's family lived in Derby for several generations but she left after she married her husband, who was in the RAF and the family, including Felicity and Elizabeth, moved around the world for a number of years before eventually settling back in the UK. Mrs Thorpe lived with her daughters in Somerset in the latter years of her life.

Derby City Council's response

Councillor Ndukwe Onuoha, city council cabinet member for Streetpride, public safety and leisure said: "Like all local authorities, we have not been immune to the recent financial challenges and every council service has had to make savings. As a result, we have been unable to carry out certain tasks, including grass cutting and shrub maintenance at the same frequency as in previous years.

“However, we have listened to the concerns of the public and we have prioritised an additional £200k for grass cutting in our budget proposal which is currently out for consultation.

“We understand that the appearance of the cemetery is of great importance to visitors and families who have loved ones resting there and, are working hard to increase the rate of maintenance by making more resources available to the grounds maintenance department.

"The section where this family grave is situated has a large area of self-set holly and bramble, which over the years has grown over a large area and covered several graves. The clearance is being undertaken when workload allows and is scheduled into the grounds maintenance winter works programme. Bereavement Services will maintain regular communication with the family regarding progress."