I was diagnosed with ADHD when I was 36 - these were the signs

A mother who was diagnosed with ADHD at 36 after growing up thinking she was “broken” now helps other women with the condition practise mindful gardening through her business after discovering the hobby “allowed her brain to rest”.

Kendall Platt, 38, described her mind as being "so quick", she couldn't "interrupt them". The mother of two - Elora, two, and Arwen, six - began researching the neurological disorder after CBT failed to help her in 2021.

She identified with symptoms such as overworking and burning out, hyper-focusing, having a "busy mind" and lacking time perception. Kendall also experienced a persistent feeling that something was off, prompting her to seek a diagnosis. However, she didn't have her appointment until January 2023 due to procrastination and pregnancy.

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Her husband, Dave, 40, initially didn't believe she showed any signs of ADHD. However, Kendall's diagnosis confirmed she had the condition, which she said made her feel validated and emotional.

Kendall believes her symptoms were overlooked, particularly in her younger years, because she excelled academically and was successful. Now, she uses her experience to help other women with ADHD through mindful gardening, a hobby she discovered that "allowed her brain to rest".

Throughout her journey, Kendall found solace in gardening and following her diagnosis, it all fell into place. Gardening provided her with repetitive tasks and gave her "headspace to process feelings".For the latest health and Covid news, sign up to our newsletter here

In 2018, she embarked on a new venture, Adventures with Flowers, which became her full-time occupation in 2020. Post her diagnosis in 2023, she has adapted it to assist women with ADHD, as well as those without neurodiversity, in learning the art of mindful gardening.

Speaking to PA Real Life, Kendall shared: "(When I was diagnosed) I felt quite emotional ... it felt quite validating, like I'm not broken, my brain just works slightly differently to other people. It's not something that I am doing wrong or a personality flaw of mine."

"I had this weird moment of feeling relief at having an answer, but also feeling a deep sense of sadness for all of those years that I've been really horrible to myself because I thought that there was something fundamentally wrong with me. I can now accept myself for who I am."

Kendall had always grappled with having a "busy brain" and managing her thoughts, and in 2021, she underwent CBT (cognitive behavioural therapy) through the NHS but found that it did not provide her with long-term relief. Her therapist attempted to teach her how to halt certain thoughts "before (they) spiral" but Kendall discovered that her brain was "so quick", she couldn't "interrupt them".

Following her diagnosis of generalised anxiety disorder by her GP, Kendall began researching mental health and neurological disorders. She found that she related to some symptoms of ADHD, particularly during her time as a forensic scientist from 2010 to 2020.

"I was in a constant cycle of overworking and burning out," she confessed. She described how she could spend hours analysing a black jacket for a tiny blood stain, hyperfocusing on it to the point where she would forget to eat.

"I'm not hyperactive, my mind is very busy, but I don't need to move around and I'm not a fidgeter. So I was like self-gaslighting, which is very common in women with ADHD," she explained.

Kendall also spoke about her 'busy mind', constantly ruminating on things and worrying about what others thought of her. She also mentioned her struggle with 'time blindness', always being early to events due to her lack of perception of time.

She admitted to having a "deep-rooted sense of always feeling something was off" and felt that a diagnosis could be "validating". So, she completed an online form through Right to Choose, answering questions about whether she identified with certain tendencies.

She then took this form to her GP who referred her to Psychiatry UK to begin the diagnosis process in June 2021. Kendall was left with a mountain of paperwork to complete before she could book her diagnosis appointment. She ended up "procrastinating" and also fell pregnant with her youngest daughter during this time.

Finally, in January 2023, she managed to complete it. Her husband also had to fill out a section of the form. Kendall was surprised to find that he didn't think she was showing any clear signs of ADHD.

She said: "I felt like I was either doing a really good job of hiding it or I'm being a bit crazy about it! The psychiatrist explained that the form was more typically filled out by parents for their children."

In January 2023, she received her diagnosis and suddenly everything made sense. Kendall believes if she had been diagnosed in her childhood, she "would have been kinder" to herself.

“I think perhaps, amongst my family, there might have been more awareness and understanding about why I was the way I was and why I was so sensitive,” Kendall added.

“I think in reality the reason I wasn’t diagnosed when I was young, is because it wasn’t public to anyone. I was doing really well in school, other than crying quite a lot, but eventually I learned to shut that down as well because I kept getting told I was too emotional.

“But of course, over time, those emotions can’t stay inside forever so they explode in anxiety or panic attacks or a multitude of other ways – drinking too much, or eating too much. So I think that if I had been diagnosed when I was younger, I hope that my family might have taken the time and care to read about ADHD, and then just approached me with just a bit more understanding.”

When she shared her diagnosis with her loved ones, Kendall felt they didn't "not quite understand it", particularly due to the general lack of awareness surrounding ADHD. Since being diagnosed, she has learned to structure her day more effectively by taking regular breaks and rewarding herself throughout the day.

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Kendall began working for herself full-time in 2020, teaching clients how to garden, hosting workshops, offering online coaching, and running a Substack community. She explained: "So I work with women who want to take more time for themselves, because they've got to this point of burnout or they've realised they're not going to be too far from it.

"I teach them to garden as a way of quieting their mind to help them grow some self worth again."

She has since written about her experiences with ADHD through her business, and has been able to help others. She expressed: "I've had so many messages from women saying they think they might have it too and I've just tried to offer some advice on things they can do to help themselves."

For more information about Adventures with Flowers, visit: www.adventureswithflowers.com.