HOLIDAY MEMORIES: Christmas traditions harder to keep in today's society

Dec. 22—Family Christmas traditions are strong in many families, but others — like those whose lives have been disrupted by divorce, illness or death — might be seeking ways to start a new tradition.

Many traditions have different origins than folks might imagine, such as decorating Christmas trees. This practice dates back to Germany in the Middle Ages, with settlers popularizing Christmas trees in America by the 1800s. If a green pickle is hidden amongst the ornaments of the tree, how that came about might be a mystery to even those who practice it. But it started with a Woolworth commercial focused on selling German ornaments shaped like a pickle, according to the History Channel website.

Tahlequah City Code Enforcement Officer Ray Hammons' family Christmas is very convention-oriented, and one of those traditions has him reading to the children from an old book every year.

"Every Christmas Eve since my children were born, we read 'The Night Before Christmas,' and now to my grandkids, as well as my 30-something children. We also have a very nice Christmas dinner where we give thanks for the birth of our savior, and tell the story of the first Christmas, and what Christmas truly means. And, of course, we also enjoy a long nap after Christmas morning," Hammons said.

Victoria Holland, delegate designate for the United Keetoowah Band of Cherokees, loves Christmas and also has a memory of being read that same book.

"I love Christmas. Growing up, every Christmas Eve, my mom would read me the story of Jesus' birth, and my dad would read me the 'The Night Before Christmas.' Then we would open up Christmas pajamas," Holland said. "Now, I still read my kids those stories on Christmas Eve. We also do presents at my in-laws' and do a Christmas Eve candlelight carol service."

Christmas is all about spending time with family and celebrating the birth of Jesus, Holland said.

Becka White is the encumbrance officer for the city of Tahlequah. She shared her family's traditions of Christmas.

"My eldest nephew was born the day after Christmas and my oldest son was born on Christmas day. After the nephew was born, those following years, we made homemade ornaments to celebrate. We've kept that tradition on with all the kids, and each kid gets their own ornament every year," White said.

White's mother started making a Rice Krispie wreath, but with cornflakes and decorated with red hot candies, and that was what they left for Santa.

"My favorite thing about Christmas is time with family," White said. "We're all spread out now. My mom had four brothers and we all lived close together. There were quite a few grandkids, and my grandma would have all of our pictures up every year, and presents, in this little-bitty house my grandpa built back in the 1960s. Everyone would come home for Christmas in Lost City."

White's great-great-great-grandmother, Rebecca Neugin, was the last survivor of the Trail of Tears. Lost City is where they settled and many of the descendants still live in that area.

"I'm named after her, and she is buried just down the road in our family cemetery," White said. "Neugin was featured in the Cherokee National Museum and the Cherokee museum in North Carolina."

The owner of Threadz Consignment, Teresa Williams, laments the loss of so many Christmas traditions.

"I was born in southern Kentucky about an hour from Nashville, so very rural and in a tiny town, but [everyone was very close]. Granny kept everything together — she was the hub," Williams said.

Williams was born in the late 1960s, and feels there is something different about how life is for people, as well as Christmas traditions, since the decades when she was growing up.

"Family cohesion was considered so important, and now I feel we are very divided in our interests," Williams said. "It's harder to make ends meet. It's making people less interested in Christmas giving and getting together. People want to buy things but they can't like they use to."

Williams has five kids and five grandchildren, and with four of the five in four different states, she only has one daughter and two grandchildren living in the area.

"I'm lucky this year because three of my kids will be here for Christmas," Williams said. "Grandmother and my parents are all gone. And I have to continue those traditions."

After their deaths, Williams realized that if she wanted to continue the traditions of Christmas, it was up to her.

"With five children and five grandkids, we've got a good start. Even if you don't have kids and grandkids, you can still make it special," Williams said. "I have so many beautiful friends and all of us — with my girlfriends especially — are having that empty nest syndrome, big time, and the holidays make it harder."

Grown children are leaving home and leading their own lives just like their parents did, creating traditions of their own.

"It is such an eye-opening experience and I wish I could tell mom, 'I'm doing it.' But those are some big shoes to fill — granny Ruby and mom," Williams said.