Yahoo News Mass. Mom Who Died by Suicide Was 'Excited' to Have Twins: 'She Loved Being a Mom,' Husband Says
Ariana Sutton’s husband tells PEOPLE he hopes to raise awareness about postpartum depression so others “can avoid our story becoming their story”
The Law Office of Sutton & Sutton
A police officer and his wife were “excited” to “start the next chapter of our lives” after welcoming twins, he tells PEOPLE. Now, he’s raising awareness about postpartum depression following her death by suicide.
Ariana Sutton, of Norton, Mass., gave birth to twins Everly and Rowan at Newton-Wellesley Hospital on May 22, says her husband, Tyler Sutton. She died nine days later.
Tyler hopes that by sharing his wife's story, he can help get people "talking" about PPD and "taking it more seriously."
Ariana first experienced PPD following her pregnancy with their eldest child, daughter Melody, now 4, according to Tyler. “It took us completely by surprise,” he recalls. “We were not prepared for it.”
PPD is a major depressive disorder that typically appears in mothers either in pregnancy or during the postpartum period after birth, Dr. Samantha Meltzer-Brody, a psychiatrist who is the director of the UNC Center for Women's Mood Disorders, tells PEOPLE.
Signs and symptoms include low mood, anxiety, rumination, lack of sleep, inability to enjoy the baby or things you previously enjoyed, and more. Mothers with PPD can also experience negative thoughts about being a burden or that life is not worth living.
Tyler recalls noticing that his wife “was suffering” when she returned home from the hospital. Without resources he could contact for help, he says he did whatever he could to try and help his wife.
courtesy of The Law Office of Sutton & Sutton
Ariana Sutton“My instinct was to try to take time off and lead and just create some sort of relief where I would care for her, I'd take more of a childcare role to give her a break,” he says. However, his efforts “ended up having the opposite effect." He said Ariana “started to believe that she was a bad mom" because he was doing what she felt was supposed to be her job.
The changes Ariana experienced were initially small enough to be “chalked up to being a new mom," but gradually worsened "until finally we needed to reach out for help," Tyler says.
“She said that, as much as everyone tried to give her positive information and try to reinforce that everything was going to be okay, it was as if a little person moved into her head and was drowning out all the positive things that we were trying to say to her,” Tyler explains.
Eventually, Ariana was admitted to Newton-Wellesley Hospital, where she sought treatment multiple times before finding a medication that worked for her. “She finally got her back to her old self,” he says.
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Over the next four years, Ariana was seemingly at her happiest when the day was over and she got to spend time with her family at home, Tyler says. They would snuggle up together on the couch and watch television together, with Melody nestled between her mom and dad.
“We'd just be sitting there, just enjoying each other's company,” Tyler recalls. “She would just be staring at our daughter, just smiling at how lucky we were. That's what made her want to have more kids.”
"She loved being a mom," he adds.
When the couple first learned they were expecting twins, the entire family was thrilled. "Even our daughter was looking forward to being a big sister," Tyler says, adding that his wife was "excited to have two more children and to have pregnancy be in our rear view mirror."
courtesy of The Law Office of Sutton & Sutton
Tyler and Ariana SuttonWhen it came time for their arrival, Ariana gave birth earlier than expected. According to a GoFundMe page set up on behalf of the family, the premature arrival of the twins “brought unforeseen challenges” for the "vibrant and devoted mother," which put “an immense strain on Ariana's mental health."
Tyler tells PEOPLE the babies, who are still receiving care at the hospital and weigh over 5 lbs. now, will hopefully "be able to come home soon."
"They're taking more to the bottle now and no longer need to rely on a feeding tube," he says, sharing that while daughter Everly is already able to breathe on her own, Rowan still needs a "little assistance," which doctors say is typical for premature babies.
Tyler says that the couple were not given much information about PPD during either of his wife’s pregnancies, or after she was hospitalized after the first child's birth. The topic was only brought up in passing, and was never discussed in depth.
“If they did mention it to me, they probably only mentioned it to me one time, and then probably never again,” Tyler says. Then, when they realized they needed help, they didn't know where to look. “Most doctors and nurses focus simply on birth and the pregnancy, not what could and what would come afterwards just for caregiving," he adds.
Meltzer-Brody believes “every single woman who has a baby” and their families should be educated about PPD and the potential warning signs. PPD is is one of the most common complications of childbirth, and needs to be “part of every conversation” women have with doctors before giving birth, she adds.
“All mothers need to make sure they are well-versed in understanding [PPD],” Meltzer-Brody tells PEOPLE. “... No mother should suffer in silence, and no family should suffer in silence."
courtesy of The Law Office of Sutton & Sutton
Tyler SuttonWith his wife’s story gaining national attention, Tyler says his goal is to get people talking about PPD — including doctors — and to make sure there are more resources in place to help moms in need, which can be as simple as providing them with phone numbers for therapists and social workers.
“Reaching out for help does not mean that you're weak,” Tyler says. “It means that you're recognizing that there's a problem and that you want to get better, so that you can get back to being the parent that you want to be and start to enjoy your family.”
There are effective treatments for PPD, too. “We have more treatments now than ever before,” Meltzer-Brody tells PEOPLE. Organizations like Postpartum Support International offer resources for those seeking help, she adds.
courtesy of The Law Office of Sutton & Sutton
Tyler and Ariana SuttonFor now, the Suttons are taking life “day by day, as best as we can” he says.
Melody has remained “in a somewhat normal routine” since her mother’s death, as recommended. “She took it very hard,” Tyler tells PEOPLE. “But we were able to bring her back and get her on track, so that she could keep being a four year old.”
Meanwhile, family and family are “lined up” and “eager” to help as the twins prepare to come home. “[I’m] just really thankful for everyone that has reached out,” Tyler says. “It means a lot.”
The Easton police officer also says that hearing people join in the conversation about PPD "fills with me some hope."
"There might be someone out there that's having trouble that can avoid our story becoming their story," he adds.
If you or someone you know is considering suicide, please contact the 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline by dialing 988, text "STRENGTH" to the Crisis Text Line at 741741 or go to 988lifeline.org.
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