Peter Facinelli Says He and Ex Jennie Garth Were 'Codependent' During Their Marriage: 'I Had to Rediscover Who I Am'

“We were very codependent on each other because we were very young, it was like we were all that we knew,” Facinelli told Garth

Jennie Garth and ex Peter Facinelli are reflecting on what went wrong in their relationship 12 years after filing for divorce.

On the June 11 episode of the I Choose Me with Jennie Garth podcast, the actress, 52, and her ex-husband, 50, continued their conversation from last week’s episode about their marriage and discussed how they became codependent during their relationship.

“We were very codependent on each other because we were very young, it was like we were all that we knew,” Facinelli told Garth. “I was codependent on you in an emotional way and you were codependent on me in an emotional way, so I think that was not the best.”

Related: Jennie Garth Says She Initially 'Emotionally Regretted' Not Fighting for More Custody with Ex Peter Facinelli

The 90210 star questioned the Twilight actor on what he meant by “codependent,” saying she didn’t consider that to be a major issue for them. Facinelli remembered them relying on one another to make decisions, adding that he didn’t often consider his own wants.

“Maybe you didn't see it as much because I was kind of living your life,” Facinelli explained. “You had a life that was established already and I came into it and I kind of moved into this established life, so for you, you were like, ‘This is great. I've got a husband and I've got dogs and I’ve got a house.’”

He said that he was so focused on maintaining a “happy wife, happy life,” that he never had a chance to explore what made himself happy. Being Garth’s husband, Facinelli said, became his identity.

“I didn't have a lot of choices — it was just a part that I felt like I was good at playing, but I hadn’t formed me,” he said. “You had already formed you, so there was a codependency there where it was like, I don't know my choices, I don't know what I like and don’t like.”

Related: Jennie Garth’s 3 Kids: All About Luca, Lola and Fiona

As he got older within their relationship, the Nurse Jackie alum said he wasn’t growing as an individual.

“I had to rediscover who I am,” he admitted.

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When they divorced and began realizing they may not agree on everything, Garth and Facinelli said navigating coparenting their three daughters, Luca, 26, Lola, 21, and Fiona, 17, had its ups and downs.

“Problems arose there because we were so used to servicing each other,” Facinelli shared, adding that they were learning how to raise their kids in a way that wasn’t just to please the other but also to follow their own personal parenting styles.

“There were good times and there were bad times, but even the bad times we got through,” the Can’t Hardly Wait actor said. “It's not fun being uncomfortable but uncomfortable is where you grow.”

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