Reverend Richard Coles has opened up about the passing of his partner David, saying he sometimes feels like his life is over.
Coles, who took part in Strictly Come Dancing in 2017, announced the death of David, 42, in December in a series of devastating posts on social media.
They met in 2007 and had been in a civil partnership since 2011.
Coles, also a musician and former member of 1980s pop group The Communards, has now delved further into his grief in an interview with The Guardian, admitting the future seems “blank” since David’s death.
He said: “I’ve had to subtract David from the future and that has taken all the future with it.
“It’s a bit blank. I think: ‘What the f**k am I going to do? Play the accordion and go to bed at 10 past six, I guess.’ Of course, it’s not the end of my life, but it feels like it’s over sometimes.”
He added: “Christianity doesn’t get you out of death… it doesn’t spare you any of that. On the contrary, I think it probably intensifies it.”
Last month Coles revealed on Radio 2’s breakfast show in its Pause For Thought segment that David had planned heartbreakingly sweet gifts for him from beyond the grave.
Coles told listeners: “Valentine’s Day, roses and chocolates, dinner for two, a carefully chosen card, with a carefully worded message, awaiting.
“Did you get one? I did, from my beloved, which came as rather a surprise, not because he is unromantic or forgetful, but because he died in December.
“With remarkable foresight he arranged for me a Valentine’s card before he departed, and I’m very touched and grateful.
“And a bit surprised, because in widowhood you think your days of wine and roses are done. Not so.”