Sometimes, we get so distracted by her bizarre palm leaf outfits, close friendship with bezzie mate Simon Cowell, and the general absolute amazingness of her life that we actually genuinely forget that she and Hollywood babe, Brad Pitt, were ever actually a thing.
Because they totally, genuinely were back in the ‘80s.
Anyho, last night we were reminded of the fact that she did the dirty with Bradders in perhaps the most hilariously graphic way possible, making her followers across the globe pull their best ‘OMFG’ face at their computer screens as they wondered what on Earth was going on.
Kicking off with one hell of a teaser, Sinitta tweeted: “I’m releasing a new autobiography. So I’ve decided to share some exclusive bits with you guys. Before I start forgetting stuff. # 51now.“
However, it wasn’t long before things got a bit wild as she followed up with: “The book will also come in laminate for all the pictures of me and Simon eating pasta, naked on the beach. # splatter # xxxfactoraps”.
Yikes - we don’t think anybody’s ready for those.
It only got weirder, continuing: “ ½ Here’s some extracts. Pg 35 3rd July 1988 – ‘Brad Pitt finally removed his towel. His manhood was smoother than a baby’s arm …
“ 2/2 … What really amazed me though were his balls … they didn’t have any wrinkles!’ # sorryangelina.”
There was also a dig made at X Factor judge Cheryl Fernandez-Versini’s expense, with one tweet quipping: “Pg88 I walked into Cheryl’s room and couldn’t believe it.She was strung out on carbs.Saw something in her eyes I’d never seen before #Energy.”
And yet another SiCo exclusive: "BTW @SimonCowell’s moobs are working breasts.During wifes pregnancy he lactated.He only really took botox to dry up milk ducts #SimonCOWell.”
Unfortunately as much as we bloomin’ want all of those tweets and their consequent stories to be real, the 51-year-old babe soon explained that she had been hacked as part of a new TV show.
Sinits wrote: “If you have noticed strange activity today those messages were not from me I’ve been hacked by new @itv2safeword. Coming soon to ITV2!
“Have now deleted the tweets made from my account by new ITV2 show Safe Word ! #OMG”
The comedy show that will reveal exactly what went down last night is set to air later on in the summer and, needless to say, we can’t bloomin’ wait to see what they have in store.