Yahoo News He told his friends and family 'I'm alright' but there was a problem
A woman embarked on a worldwide mission in memory of her brother.
Will Smith was 30 years old when he took his own life in August 2021. His sister, Nina, said they had a happy childhood together.
Nina, 35, from Wigan told the ECHO: “To a week, there were two years between me and Will. He was two years younger than me. He always sort of followed me around wherever I went.
READ MORE: Woman says 'it's ridiculous' after trying new hair salon
READ MORE: 'I couldn't go into shops or wait in queues until I tried this'
“He wasn't quite as confident, but he had a really big heart and was really quite sensitive. I've had people message me since saying that he'd gone out of the way to help them when they were struggling.”
Laughing, she added: “He was also daft as a brush. I remember once, my mum and dad were on holiday, and he rang me and he said, Nina, Nina, you'll have to come home, I'm starving, they've not left me any food in the fridge. I said, Will, there's so much food in the freezer. And he said, it was all out of date, so I've thrown it away.”
Will appeared to not be fully himself in the last few weeks of his life. Nina feels she didn't know the signs to look out for and might have been able to help him if she did.
Nina said: “He had a good job. He was a site manager, had a company car, good family. There were signs that he was struggling but he would always just say, 'yeah, I'm alright, I’m alright'.
“He'd actually attended A&E four days previously for trying to take his own life. But he'd been discharged, so you sort of think, 'well, if they've discharged him, they're the doctors, so if they thought he was at risk, they would have kept him in, wouldn't they?'
“He had made some comments to his friends at the gym. And they'd said, are you alright Will? And he'd gone 'yeah, yeah, I'm alright, I'm alright now. I'm okay now'.
"But obviously it wasn't okay. The lockdown had hit him really hard. He really struggled with that because, when all the building sites were shut, that meant he couldn't work, and the gyms were shut, and the gym was an enormous thing that helped him with his mental health.
“But really, we just didn't know. You just never believe it'll happen to you. I think that was the problem. We just never thought he would actually take his own life.”
Nina, motivated by what she had seen while being a teacher, had decided to return to university to study for a Masters degree at Edge Hill University in mental health studies. She found out Will had died two weeks before her course started.
She said: “I'm still in shock to be honest. That's the only way I can speak about it because I don't actually still believe that it's happened, if that makes sense.
“I've still really not come to terms with it but to get the knock on the door and to be told what had happened was just catastrophic, especially in the context of about to start this research in suicide prevention for the Masters.
“It just seemed just an impossible situation to be in. You couldn't make it up, that I've been so excited to start the research in suicide prevention and then get this knock on the door to tell me that he had taken his own life.
“We're such a close family. It just seemed, and still does seem, so unbelievable. Then starting the Masters, the first day, we did a day's suicide prevention training, which is all the things I wish I would have known two weeks before.
“If I would have known what to say, what to recognise, what to look out for, the places he could have got help, although that's not always an easy thing getting help with the state of the system at the moment. It was incredibly difficult. Because it was a Masters in mental health, it did feel like all of it was completely personal and completely pertinent to Will and what had happened.”
Nevertheless, Nina worked hard during her degree and embarked on a mission to promote and improve suicide prevention training across the world. Nina successfully applied for a Churchill Fellowship which supports individuals to follow their passion for change by learning from innovation across the world and then sharing their experiences in the UK.
She has already visited Australia and will travel to the US to learn from schools and leading organisations like Orygen Youth Health in Australia and the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention.
Nina’s Fellowship proposal was inspired by school-based research carried out during her time at Edge Hill while studying, supported by a bursary provided by Everton in the Community, the official charity of Everton Football Club.
Nina developed and delivered self-harm and suicide prevention workshops to female pupils, aged 14 – 16, all of whom had experience of self-harm or suicidal behaviour. She is currently in discussions with Edge Hill about how they can use the findings from the fellowship to enhance the university’s teacher training education.
Nina’s drive for change has also attracted the support of key suicide prevention campaigners 3 Dads Walking, who are lobbying to make suicide prevention a compulsory part of the UK school curriculum.
Nina said: “The report will be a collection of all that I've learned with a series of recommendations, which I'll then be campaigning and raising awareness on to try and influence policy and practice in all schools here.
“I'm lucky enough to work at Edge Hill, which is the north west's largest teacher training provider, and they're really positive about it. The more things we can implement at Edge Hill, all the other universities will follow, the more people that realise this is only going to go one way. I'm confident that suicide prevention will be made a compulsory part of our curriculum, which means that teachers and schools need to be equipped with the tools to do that.
“The sooner we start equipping our teachers and equipping our schools and giving them the funding that they need, the better placed they'll be when it is made compulsory to.
“In Australia, they have something called Mental Health Menu. Each school gets a designated amount of money based on the number of pupils they have, just to spend on mental health.
“I'm really hoping by shining a light on the good practice that's going on around the world compared to the bad deal that our kids are getting regularly, that things will improve.”
Professor Smith, Director of Edge Hill’s new Centre for Mental Health, Sport and Physical Activity Research, and Dr O’Keeffe, Associate Dean in the Faculty of Education, are working on how Nina’s findings can be implemented into its existing on mental health and suicide prevention in schools.
They said: “Alongside Edge Hill’s Outstanding Ofsted rating for initial teacher education and world leading impactful research in mental health, Nina’s drive and insight will be invaluable as we continue to focus on how we can support schools, teachers, young people and their communities.
“We want to empower people like Nina, with lived experience of mental health challenges, to support the work of the Centre and Faculty of Education so that it continues to have a real, positive impact on policy and practice in this field.”
Mental health support
Helplines and support groups
The following are helplines and support networks for people to talk to, mostly listed on the NHS Choices website
Samaritans (116 123) operates a 24-hour service available every day of the year. If you prefer to write down how you're feeling, or if you're worried about being overheard on the phone, you can email Samaritans at jo@samaritans.org.
CALM Campaign Against Living Miserably (0800 58 58 58) is a leading movement against suicide. It runs a UK helpline and webchat from 5pm to midnight 365 days a year for anyone who has hit a wall for any reason, who need to talk or find information and support.
PANDAS (0808 1961 776) runs a free helpline and offers a support service for people who may be suffering with perinatal mental illness, including prenatal (antenatal) and postnatal depression plus support for their family or network.
Childline (0800 1111) runs a helpline for children and young people in the UK. Calls are free and the number won't show up on your phone bill.
PAPYRUS (0800 068 41 41) is an organisation supporting teenagers and young adults who are feeling suicidal.
Mind (0300 123 3393) is a charity providing advice and support to empower anyone experiencing a mental health problem. They campaign to improve services, raise awareness and promote understanding.
Students Against Depression is a website for students who are depressed, have a low mood or are having suicidal thoughts.
Bullying UK is a website for both children and adults affected by bullying.
Amparo provides emotional and practical support for anyone who has been affected by a suicide. This includes dealing with police and coroners; helping with media enquiries; preparing for and attending an inquest and helping to access other, appropriate, local support services. Call 0330 088 9255 or visit www.amparo.org.uk for more details.
Hub of Hope is the UK’s most comprehensive national mental health support database. Download the free app, visit hubofhope.co.uk or text SHOUT to 85258 to find relevant services near you.
Young Persons Advisory Service – Providing mental health and emotional wellbeing services for Liverpool’s children, young people and families. tel: 0151 707 1025 email: support@ypas.org.uk
Paul's Place - providing free counselling and group sessions to anyone living in Merseyside who has lost a family member or friend to suicide. Tel: 0151 226 0696 or email: paulsplace@beaconcounsellingtrust.co.uk
The Martin Gallier Project - offering face to face support for individuals considering suicide and their families. Opening hours 9.30-16.30, 7 days a week. Tel: 0151 644 0294 email: triage@gallierhouse.co.uk
James' Place - supports men over 18 who are experiencing a suicidal crisis by providing quick access to therapy and support. Call 0151 303 5757 from Monday to Friday between 9.30am and 5.30pm or visit https://www.jamesplace.org.uk/
Don't miss the biggest and breaking stories by signing up to the Echo Daily newsletter here
