Zoe Ball has confessed the death of her partner Billy Yates left her in shock for two years.
The camerman took his own life in 2017 at the age of 40 following a long battle with depression.
Ball, 49, told Red magazine: “I believe I was in shock for two years afterwards. It’s like you can’t see beyond putting your feet on the floor and getting out of bed each day.”
Ball split from husband Norman Cook, aka Fatboy Slim in 2016 and was first pictured with Yates in February 2017.
The Strictly: It Takes Two presenter admitted losing love “will nearly end you”, but she has learned to find love again in all aspects of her life.
She said: “To feel love is the most incredible feeling in the world. To lose it will nearly end you and take you to your knees, but there’s always more. You know, I look at my kids or my friends and think, ‘I couldn’t love you any more.’ And then I do. Love just keeps on coming.”
Ball is mother to 19-year-old son Woody Cook - who appeared on Channel 4’s The Circle last year - and 10-year-old daughter Nelly.
The former ‘ladette’ who was famous for her public partying in th 90s also opened up about her relationship with alcohol.
She said: “I’ve done a lot of work on my issues with booze. I’ve been able to forgive myself.It’s taken me a long time to grow up. There is help at hand with AA and other support networks.”
Ball first spoke publicly about Yates death in when she took part in BBC documentary Zoe Ball's Hardest Way Home, for Sport Relief, taking on a cycling challenge to raise money to help mental illness charities.
Ball tearfully recalled the last time she way Yates, saying: “He got on his bike and he cycled off and he turned round and he blew me a kiss goodbye, and that was the last time I saw him.
“And I feel really grateful that I got my goodbye in a way. And I think that was my goodbye.”