32 Timelessly Funny Quotes From Clue

Kelly West

24 June 2024 at 11:00 am

Grab a beverage and enjoy these quotes (not the cognac... just in case.)

“I’m afraid I’m a little bit accident prone.”

“Oh please, I’ve never heard anything so ridiculous, I mean nobody could blackmail me, my life is an open book, I’ve never done anything wrong.” Mrs. Peacock

“Are you trying to make me look stupid in front of the other guests?” - Col. Mustard - “You don’t need any help from me.” - Wadsworth - “That’s right!” - Col. Mustard

“Why would he want to kill you in public?” - Miss Scarlet - “I think she meant he threatened, in public, to kill her.” - Wadsworth

“Your second husband also disappeared.” - “Well, that was his job. He was an illusionist.” - Mrs. White “He never re-appeared.” - “He wasn’t’ a very good illusionist.”

“There is safety in numbers… my dear.” - Col Mustard

“If I was the killer, I would kill you next.” -- Col. Mustard

“Nobody. No body. That’s what we mean. Mr. Boddy’s body, it’s gone.” - Wadsworth

“I’m not shouting! All right, I am. I’m shouting! I’m shouting I’m shouting I’m shouting!” - Wadsworth

“Just checking.” - Col. Mustard — “Everything all right?” Mrs. Peacock — Yup. Two corpses, everything’s fine.” Col. Mustard

“This is war, Peacock! Casualties are inevitable. You can not make an omelet without breaking eggs, every cook will tell you that.” Col. Mustard - “But look what happened to the cook!” - Mrs. Peacock

“Let us in, let us in!” — “Let us out, let us out!”

“Not the cognac… just in case.” - Wadsworth

“He won’t be driving home, officer, I can promise you that.” - Professor Plum

“Will you stop that!” - Mr. Green - “No.” Wadsworth

“Oh, whoever it is, they gotta go away or they’ll be killed!” - Mrs. Peacock

“Our lives are in danger, ya beatnik!” - Mrs. Peacock

“One plus two plus two plus one.” Wadsworth

“Is the FBI in the habit of cleaning up after multiple murder?” -- Professor Plum — “Yes. Why do you think it’s run by a man called Hoover?” -- Wadsworth

“I hated her so much. Flames-FLAMES on the side of my face…” Mrs. White

“I didn’t know it was that free!” - Wadsworth

“I’ll catch her. Fall into my arms!… Sorry…” Wadsworth

“Unless… unless she dies too…” Mr. Green

Grab a beverage and enjoy these quotes (not the cognac... just in case.)

No matter how many times I watch Clue, the 1985 mystery-comedy never fails to entertain. Not only is it one of the best mystery movies of all time, it’s also one of the best 1980s movies to be made in the decade that gave us so many great films. With its memorable characters and excellent ending (or three endings, technically), Clue delivers moment after moment of greatness, and more than a handful of memorable quotes that have stood the test of time. Here are some of our all-time favorites.

And to be clear, this article is brimming with spoilers, so if you’ve somehow wandered in here not having seen the movie, we suggest you head off to watch it before reading ahead!

Paramount Pictures

Clue is chock full of timeless quotes. We picked some of the best of them to revisit and enjoy!

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