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The 12 worst kind of people you'll encounter on public transport

After some heated debate in the Yahoo office, here are the definitive travel grievances which really ‘grind our gears’

The London Underground: Testing (Getty)

Campaigners against the ‘Women eating on the Tube’ Facebook group will next week stage a lunchtime sit-in on the Circle Line to make their feelings known.

The response is a public backlash to an online forum which photographs female passengers eating on the Underground.

Picking on women eating on public transport seems hurtful and unnecessary. However - people do plenty of genuinely infuriating things on the Tube, trains and buses.

After some heated debate in the Yahoo office, here are 12 travel grievances which really ‘grind our gears’.

1. SPACE INVADERS
Whether it’s the alpha males insistent on spreading their legs as wide as possible, the out-of-towners with luggage everywhere, or the dozing commuters with limbs all over the place, those with little spatial awareness are always a huge annoyance.



Buses and Tube carriages aren’t blessed with space - backpack wearers who keep their massive luggage on their backs for entire journeys would do well to keep this in mind. And bags on the seat next to you? Don’t even get us started….

2. PUBLIC DISPLAYS OF AFFECTION
You’re in a loved-up relationship and can’t keep your hands off each other. Sure. But get a room, eh? We’re not prudes, but we are British and we don’t want to see you sucking face on the Northern Line in the rush hour.


3. NOISY EATING
Commuters - especially Londoners - are always in a rush, and we have no real objection to eating on public transport per se. But that doesn’t excuse loudly chowing down like a neanderthal. More prevalent on late-night tubes and buses when people are more drunk and less inhibited.

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4. DOOR-DWELLERS
Referred to by one Yahoo colleague as ‘goal-hangers’, they’re the rage-generating passengers who step on to a busy train, avoid the spacious aisles of the carriage and instead plonk themselves next to the door for maximum annoyance.



They cause a chain reaction of fury - you feel obligated to squeeze past them into the space they should’ve taken themselves. Seconds later, a latecomer’s anger will boil over and a passive-aggressive, ‘Can you move down please?!’ will echo through the carriage. All because of the door-dwellers. On the subject of which...

5. NOT WAITING FOR ME TO GET OFF BEFORE YOU GET ON
A personal favourite. As the carriage grinds to a halt and the hoards are huddled at the exact spot where the doors open, you prepare to shuffle on to the platform. But hang on, what’s going on here? The Law Of The Tube dictates you MUST wait for people to leave before you get on (Underground announcer lady even says so), but some are so fist-clenchingly impatient they barge onto the Tube before you’re even close to exiting. I don’t want to exaggerate, but this should be a criminal offence.

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6. SHOULDER SLEEPERS
You work long hours or you've had a heavy night. You’re exhausted and you can’t keep your eyes open. But if you’re going to nod off, do you have to do it in my personal space? The worst case scenario is the dozing commuter who falls asleep on your shoulder - truly a cringeworthy experience from which there’s no easy escape.

7. OVER-THE-SHOULDER VOYEURS
Whether it’s the strangers you can feel reading your half-composed text message or the commuter too lazy to bring their own reading material, this lesser-spotted form of personal space-invasion can be equally as annoying.

8. SUNGLASSES WEARERS
A niche selection this, but still valid. You’re 30 metres underneath the nearest source of natural light - take off the sunglasses. You’re not Bono.


9. MUSIC BLARERS
Many of us love a bit of travel music to pump us up for the working day, but the number of commuters with poor volume control is staggering. Sometimes they’re suited twenty-something execs pumping out trance from their overpriced Beats, other times they’re sulky teens whose Metallica can be heard throughout the carriage. Either way, they’re serial journey-ruiners.

10. NOISY PHONE CONVERSATIONS
Continuing on the noise theme, those who just don’t seem to have an ‘indoor voice’ really are utterly intolerable.


They’ve been around since the dawn of the mobile phone, but even after all this time some never learn. To the middle manager loudly rearranging their 10am office meeting for the whole carriage - pipe down.

11. ESCALATOR ETIQUETTE
Seasoned commuters know it’s the unspoken rule: stand on the right, walk on the left. But that doesn’t stop people with a common sense bypass from constantly parking themselves on the wrong side of the escalator. Yes, it only delays us by a few more seconds. Yes, it's still on the list.



12. DOING YOUR MAKE-UP


A contentious one. Some have no issue with women ‘putting their face on’ on public transport, but for others it’s a constant source of rage. In the words of one Yahoo college: ‘Get up earlier’.

Have we missed out one of your public transport pet hates? Let us know in the comments below: