Beefy flowers and greasy holes – Is this the filthiest Celebrity Bake Off yet?

Kimberley Bond
Channel 4

The Great Celebrity Bake Off for Stand Up to Cancer is here to distract us from our lockdown blues and tonight’s all-star episode didn’t disappoint.

While the baking competition is famous for its naughty double-entendres and quirky characters, our four bakers really surpassed themselves, with James Blunt, Alex Jones, Alison Hammond and Joe Sugg proving to be even more eccentric and filthy (and disastrous) than previous regular contenders.

Things started badly after Joe cut his finger and passed out just minutes into the first showstopper challenge, which saw the celebrities make a tray bake.

However, it really was Joe’s “Rocky moment”, as he put it, as his efforts saw him win a handshake from the steely-eyed Paul Hollywood himself.

This Morning interviewer Alison believed she was in her element, announcing she was “literally a natural baker” – before wondering where her oven door went.

She managed to pull it back after nailing the Yorkshire pudding technical, winning viewers’ hearts as she found the whole debacle hilarious.

You’re Beautiful singer James channelled the spirit of series seven fan favourite Val by listening to his sponge to see whether it was ready.

But it was The One Show host Alex that lowered the tone in the tent with her filthy bakes.

Admitting she was not much a baker before she started ("I made a banana bread that tasted of tuna"), Alex immediately raised a few eyebrows when she sculpted a naked man for her signature challenge – who ended up being marked with an unfortunate, well, see for yourself:

She then started giggling during the technical as she “oiled her holes” while preparing to put her mini Yorkshires in the oven and talked about her “beefy flower” garnish.

And things went from bad to worse for Alex, after breaking her bowl and slicing her finger during her biscuit fantasy showstopper.

Watching from afar, Alison channelled all of us as she commented: “I love a bit of drama.”

With none of our bakers being particularly skilled, star baker went to Joe, who was admittedly the best of a bad bunch.

“Who'd have thought it?" he said. "I'm never taking this apron off."

The Great Celebrity Bake Off for Stand Up to Cancer continues Tuesdays at 8pm on Channel 4

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