Could Kim Kardashian really make it with Staten Island’s own Pete Davidson?

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 (Getty Images)
(Getty Images)

When the black, stretch RangeRover limo pulled up in front of ”Mario’s King of Pizza” on Staten Island, the workers knew it wasn’t a local guy coming in for a slice. California goddess Kim Kardashian is dating Staten Island good guy Pete Davidson. Pizza is what you get when you date a local yokel.

Previously multi-married Kim is used to high rollers – and big egos. Her most recent ex sometimes confuses himself with Jesus and has his own line of high-priced sneakers. Meanwhile, Davidson is a comedian and cast member on Saturday Night Live. One of his claims to fame is all the beautiful women he’s dated.

Indeed, the 27-year-old funny man is said to enjoy the attention and paparazzi that comes with dating famous women. Last spring, he strolled through English gardens and went to Wimbledon with Bridgerton heroine Phoebe Dynevor. Average women were trapped in quarantine, but Dynevor was conducting a scandalous 19th-century romance onscreen. How did she find the transition from the tantalizing, tight breeches-wearing Duke of Hastings to Davidson’s Gap T-shirts? One can only wonder.

Before Dynevor, Davidson dated Kate Beckinsale, Maid star Margaret Qualley, model Kaia Gerber, and Cazzie David, daughter of millionaire malcontent Larry David. Perhaps most famously, in 2018, he dated and was briefly engaged to singer Ariana Grande, who famously dismissed him with her hit song, “Thank U, Next!”

What do all these highly accomplished, impossibly beautiful women — who now include Kim Kardashian — see in Davidson? Sure, he can crack a joke. That will come in handy when they’re relaxing at Fresh Kills Park on Staten Island. Formerly the world’s largest trash landfill, Fresh Kills is now reclaimed land. When the breeze shifts and a strange smell wafts over their picnic, Pete will surely have something funny to say.

The newest romance broke when Davidson and Kardashian were photographed holding hands on the rollercoaster at Knot’s Berry Farm in California. E! News reported that Kardashian enjoys hanging out with Davidson and thinks he’s hilarious. Wait until he takes her to ride the Wonder Wheel at Luna Park and buys her a hotdog, dipped out of hot gray water and slapped in a bun, rescued from seagulls on the boardwalk. Just make sure Kim doesn’t get her Louboutin heel stuck in the boards and turn her ankle.

Kim K, self-described socialite, businesswoman and media diva, will have to get used to living in the shadow of Manhattan, far from Park Avenue. Sure, they can ride the ferry to go to Mercer Kitchen or Le Cirque in the city. In fact, the pair have been spotted at Zero Bond, a private, exclusive social club and restaurant in NYC’s Noho, as recently as yesterday. But it’s a shlep from Manor Heights into the city. Riding the ferry is freezing in the winter. Take-out rigatoni from Guiliana’s Ristorante down the street is much more likely.

From her home near Los Angeles, Kim has gone to concerts at the Hollywood Bowl. Imagine her surprise when Pete suggests a date at Rab’s Bowling – a Staten Island favorite for more than 20 years where you get your rental shoes sprayed with disinfectant before you put them on. Different vibes, but a lot to love.

If Kim wants to just relax, Staten Island is a good choice. It’s known as the greenest borough — once you get past Newark Airport, the oil refineries and the cargo ships at the port of Bayonne. Oh, then leave Rodeo Drive and take the Bayonne Bridge to the Van Wyck Expressway. Don’t get on the Long Island Expressway; stay on Veterans’ Parkway to Richmond Avenue, pass Costco and head toward the Goethals Bridge. Yup, if you can drive on Staten Island, you deserve celebrity status.

But are Kardashian and Davidson built to last? Newspapers have reported that both are just taking a break, looking for a relationship that isn’t serious. That could be it; they could both be messing around. Then again, what if it blossoms into true love? Maybe for husband number four, Kim is looking for a nice guy she can settle down with. They can buy a cozy duplex on Arthur Kill Road, past the bagel shop near the Technical High School, and live life out of the limelight.

Nah... it will be over by the time they have the big fight over whether to go to her family on the West Coast or his on the East for Thanksgiving.

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