Yahoo News Critic’s Notebook: Donald Trump’s 34 Felony Counts Put Him at the Center of the Political Universe (Again)
History, and certainly infamy, was made today when Donald Trump became the first former U.S. president slapped with criminal charges. He dutifully showed up for his arrest and arraignment in Lower Manhattan to face what was revealed by Manhattan District Attorney Alvin Bragg to be 34 felony counts of falsifying business records, to which he pleaded not guilty.
Trump was spared the indignity of being handcuffed, perp walked or placed in a cell. He apparently also wasn’t subjected to a mug shot, which is a shame because I was hoping to make it my new home screen. Of course, that didn’t stop the Trump campaign from quickly advertising a T-shirt for sale with a fake mug shot, which can be yours for a mere $47 donation.
More from The Hollywood Reporter
Donald Trump Arraigned on Criminal Charges, Pleads Not Guilty
Elizabeth Vargas Bets She Can Build a NewsNation "Newscast of Record"
Why John Oliver Barely Addressed Donald Trump's Indictment on 'Last Week Tonight'
The only thing that would have made the occasion better is if Trump had surrendered to Olivia Benson, complete with the Law & Order “dum-dum” clanging in the background. Of course, Trump was charged with financial, not sex crimes.
For the history trivia buffs among you, Trump is not actually the first president to be arrested. That dubious distinction belongs to Ulysses S. Grant, who was arrested while in office in 1872 for the crime of speeding on a Washington, D.C., street in his horse-and-buggy. Ironically, the arresting officer was Black, which just goes to show that history repeats itself.
The bad news is that the Trump reality show continues to dominate the national conversation. The good news is that it’s turned into a true-crime series. Somewhere, Hillary Clinton, subjected to so many unhinged group chants of “Lock her up!” during Trump rallies, is laughing her ass off.
The media chaos began yesterday, with Trump’s plane being tracked from Florida to New York City as if it were a UFO or Chinese “weather” balloon. The cable news channels later provided helicopter shots of his motorcade traveling into the city a la the O.J. Simpson Bronco chase. Fittingly, Simpson weighed in on the case on social media, advising us, “Our opinion means diddly. Let the jury system work.” The jury system certainly worked for him, but let’s face it, with friends like O.J., you don’t need enemies.
Since the indictment, the media has become obsessed with constant reports about Trump’s “mood,” which is definitely more than he’s ever cared about anyone’s feelings. We’ve been informed that he was “upbeat,” “defiant,” “angry,” “upset,” “resilient,” “shocked” and “giggly.” (I might have made that last one up.)
Hours before his arraignment, Trump had suggested on Truth Social that his case should be given a change of venue to Staten Island. Because in ultra-liberal New York City, that’s the only borough where he can get arrested.
Prior to Trump’s arrival at the Manhattan Criminal Courthouse, hundreds of protestors, both supportive and not, gathered in a park nearby. Several fights broke out, and Rep. Marjorie Taylor Greene spoke for about 10 minutes before fleeing, her voice having been drowned out by whistles that had been distributed to the crowd — ironically by a Trump supporter. (Someone should have provided Lesley Stahl with one a few nights ago.)
The congresswoman also gave an interview in which she compared Trump to other “incredible people” throughout history who have been arrested, such as Nelson Mandela. And Jesus. To which one can only respond, “Jesus!” Habitual liar George Santos also briefly showed up. Or maybe he just said he did.
After spending the night in his beloved Trump Tower — alone, since Melania, well, you know — Trump traveled downtown, presumably having descended on the same “golden escalator” that he used to make his presidential announcement a mere eight years ago (seems like decades, doesn’t it?). He made no comments before boarding his limo, merely raising his fist to the crowd with a pained expression on his face.
He also made no statements later after leaving the district attorney’s office and entering the courtroom, only glaring at reporters with the sort of death stare he normally reserves for his male children. Only still photographers were allowed in the courtroom, with the first picture released to the media being one of Trump sitting with his lawyers while several NYC court officers stood stoically behind him. He didn’t look nearly as happy as he normally does while posing next to fast food orders.
The hearing went on much longer than anticipated, leaving the pundits plenty of time to spin various theories about the reasons for the delay. When Trump finally emerged, he again said nothing to reporters, in a rare example of him keeping his mouth shut. His motorcade then left for the airport, providing yet another cliffhanger ending for a show that will seemingly never end.
Best of The Hollywood Reporter
