Yahoo News Survivor 44 player admits to 'overconfident fart'
As the players on Survivor 44 familiarize themselves with the nuances of aqua dumping, it seems like a good time to turn our attention to some other gastrointestinal miscues that have taken place among the cast before the game even started.
We asked all 18 contestants just days before filming to share their most embarrassing moments ever, and some of their responses exceeded our wildest (and grossest) expectations. You can enjoy the entire assortment of stories in the above video, but before consuming that main course, whet your palate with this appetizer courtesy of Danny Massa.
Robert Voets/CBS Danny Massa of 'Survivor 44'
Danny also calls himself Danny Bronx, but his embarrassing story takes place down the shore in Atlantic City. In his story, Danny went on a diuretic to lose weight for a mixed martial arts bout he was set to compete in (which, we should clarify, was not against a coconut). While on said diuretic and walking through the streets of Atlantic City — where he had gone to see a friend fight — Danny let loose "an overconfident fart." Unfortunately, he adds, "It wound up being more than a fart."
Excuse us? But the story does not (rear) end there. "It gets worse," explains Danny. "I had to go change, and the only store on that block was a lingerie store. So I had to get rid of my underwear, and I wore very scantily clad underpants that night from the lingerie store."
However, you will be relieved to learn this story has a happy ending. "It was comfy!" reveals Danny of his revealing undergarments.
A great story, surely, but it's got nothing on story number two (emphasis ours). For that, we go to Carolyn Wiger.
"I'm lactose intolerant," Carolyn tells EW. "I was born that way. But I love ice cream so much, and I was eating ice cream, and, of course, I pooped my pants."
Wow, that sounds terrible. What comes next, though, displays perhaps the strongest dedication to ice cream we've ever seen. "I was having so much fun… that I didn't even want to change and was like, 'whatever,'" continues Carolyn. "So I told people I slipped in mud. And I just went along with it. Okay, I got poop on my butt, but whatever."
She continues to eat ice cream to this day, but only one particular flavor. "So now I just eat chocolate, so if I poop my pants while I'm eating it, I can just say 'Oh, I sat on it, or it spilled."
Robert Voets/CBS The 'Survivor 44' cast
Those are butt… I mean, but a few of the embarrassing stories that await you. Who had a wardrobe malfunction? Whose wardrobe included blue underwear? Who wiped out in a roller rink bathroom? And whose biggest fear is "complicated bro handshakes"? Watch the video at the top of the post and find out for yourselves. And then go enjoy a big bowl of chocolate ice cream... at least we think it's ice cream.
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