“Young and the Restless” Star Kristoff St. John’s Struggles Are Examined in New Documentary — Watch the Trailer (Exclusive)

The documentary 'Kristoff' looks at the late actor's journey on and off-screen

Kristoff St. John is remembered by many viewers for his fine onscreen work, but behind the scenes, the beloved soap star dealt with struggles, which will now be explored in an eye-opening documentary.

Directed by Bobby Razak, Kristoff, which premieres in early 2025, will examine the life of St. John, who died in February 2019 from heart disease at 52. The actor, who received two Daytime Emmy Awards for his portrayal of Neil Winters on The Young and the Restless, a role he originated in 1991, also shared three children — Paris, Lola and his late son, Julian — with ex-wife Mia St. John.

The trailer provided exclusively to PEOPLE offers a glimpse at St. John’s difficult journey, including his success as a child actor, his sexual assault as a child by the late Sathya Sai Baba and Julian’s suicide in November 2014 at age 24 following a lifelong struggle with mental illness.

Related: 'The Young & the Restless' Cast Mourns Kristoff St. John: 'He Left an Indelible Mark'

The trailer opens with a previously recorded voiceover of St. John professing a love for his “Hollywood life." Growing up as a successful child actor, he lived in the suburbs of Los Angeles and lived what he liked to call the “all-American middle-class dream."

“As a child actor, he never really got to know who he was or to learn how to be a normal child,” Mia says off camera.

Next, the trailer shows Baba, an Indian guru and spiritual leader followed by Kristoff’s family for 10 years, whom Kristoff claims sexually assaulted him when he was young.  

“With shame and embarrassment, I told my dad in Baba’s private room, Baba had fondled me and sworn me to secrecy, claiming that he was giving me divine purification,” he recalls.

Cutting to Kristoff's onscreen work in projects like The Young and the Restless and footage of him receiving a Daytime Emmy Award, Kristoff explains he was “hellbent” on “resurrecting” his acting career.

Related: 'Young and the Restless' Star Victoria Rowell Mourns Kristoff St. John: 'He Lived for the Day'

“I was working with the best, starring on television shows and films. I was back,” he continues.

But as his work took off, he became addicted to drugs, Mia, 56, shares.

“After Sai Baba and the sexual abuse, he started with crack. It became an obsession,” she explains.

As intimate footage shows St. John drinking and lighting up a pipe, he says via voiceover he was “full of shame, adding more fuel to an already raging fire.”

“What most people didn't know about Kristoff was that he was bipolar,” Mia adds. “He was suffering from a mental illness.”

While the actor admits he was “completely confused” at the time, he was “not alone,” eventually tying the knot with Mia, a five-time world boxing champion, who remembers how she met the actor at an Alcholics Anonymous meeting.

Related: Shemar Moore Reveals 'Running Joke' He Had with 'Young and the Restless' Costar Kristoff St. John

“I stayed sober throughout the entire relationship,” she says. “Kristoff continued [drug use] off and on throughout his life. One day before I gave birth, Kristoff started back on crack cocaine.”

While Kristoff continued to land roles and went on to star on The Young and Restless for two decades, he struggled when the cameras weren’t rolling.

“He would come to the set with delirium tremors — the shakes,” Mia remembers. “He couldn't remember his lines. He just could not work.”

“When Julian started developing mental health issues, it became very difficult on Kristoff,” she continues. “He just didn’t know what to do.”

Julian’s death in 2014 was devastating for the actor, who said getting notified by phone was “the worst call I’d ever had in my life,” “It’s every parent’s nightmare,” he added.

Related: Kristoff St. John's Son's Suicide Was a 'Breaking Point' for Late Actor, Colleague Says

While Julian’s death was officially ruled a suicide, Kristoff “remained adamant” until his own death in 2019 that his son was actually murdered. In the years that followed, the actor sought solace once again in alcohol.

“He [Kristoff] couldn't find a way out. He couldn't save himself. Nobody could save him,” Mia contends.

As the trailer winds down, zooming in on a portrait of Kristoff slowly dissolving, the actor himself offers a haunting sign-off.

“It's almost as if we invite the madness and enjoy the pain,” he concludes.

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 Kristoff premieres in early 2025.

If you or someone you know has been sexually assaulted, please contact the National Sexual Assault Hotline at 1-800-656-HOPE (4673) or go to rainn.org.

If you or someone you know is struggling with substance abuse, please contact the SAMHSA helpline at 1-800-662-HELP.

If you or someone you know is considering suicide, please contact the 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline by dialing 988, text "STRENGTH" to the Crisis Text Line at 741741 or go to 988lifeline.org.

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