Exeter man fears 'for his life' in mental health battle

For the past decade, 56-year-old Sean May has been struggling with his mental health to the extent that he regularly reaches crisis point and has made numerous attempts to end his life. He experienced his first severe episode after the stress of working as a multi-drop delivery driver triggered a breakdown.

Sean, of Exeter, was referred to his GP and has since been diagnosed with emotionally unstable personality disorder, chronic anxiety and post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD). It has left him unable to work but with the help of a family friend who is his full-time carer and medication, he has periods of stability but still endures severe lapses.

In 2018, Sean was located in Exeter by Dartmoor Search and Rescue teams as well as a police helicopter after being reported missing. He had been left feeling suicidal after claiming he had not received the support he required from his GP and mental health services during a period when his mental health had escalated.

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Following the incident, he says he was taken to A&E as a place of safety and after receiving a psychiatric assessment was discharged back into the community the following morning. His most recent suicide attempt was last September when he was led to safety from a bridge in Exeter by police.

He claims an officer took out their taser but did not use it. He says he was detained in the back of a police car for around two hours until a place of safety became available at Wonford House and later discharged.

Around five hours later that day he was rescued by police again after being found on a railway track in Exeter in the early hours of the morning. He says he was discharged back into the community the next day by the same doctor who had assessed him after his prior suicide attempt.

Sean was discharged from secondary care services - services which generally need a referral from a GP such as psychological wellbeing services, community mental health teams (CMHTs), crisis resolution and home treatment teams (CRHTs) - last September.

He says the only help he now receives is from local support groups for men struggling with their mental health. Sean has shared his experiences of being in the mental health care system in Exeter to raise awareness of what he described as being caught in the 'middle gap' or not being poorly enough for some services but having mental health conditions to severe for others to deal with.

Sean says he lives in 'fear of his life' because he believes he is not getting the help he needs or should be receiving, and is calling for urgent changes to help those people like himself who are struggling to cope.

This is his story in his words:

"It's just an awful situation. What's really hurtful is when I'm in a mental health crisis I'm not in control and I can't regulate myself. I then rely on services to help me but I get more help from the police and A&E than I do mental health services as at least they are there 24/7.

"Each time I have been in a crisis it is the police who have picked me up. None of those incidents have ever involved a criminal aspect; it's simply me being in a mental health crisis. The police have always shown very good empathy.

"I do fear for my life. When I end up being taken to a place of safety it's not a cry for help; it's just where my mental health takes me.

"You're either too ill or not ill enough. It's a national problem and I don't know the answers but I can't stay silent any more because I have absolutely had enough of it.

"I can't get any help at all and feel like I have become a victim of the system, and I'm not the only one. Mental health services are being pushed more into the community and the voluntary sector who are all struggling with funding. They don't have a full roster of support when your mental health is at a higher level.

"GPs are very limited by what they can do other than to refer you back to secondary care services. I can't be helped by Talkworks [a free NHS falling therapy service] because I have been told my mental health problems are at a higher level than their counsellors are trained to manage.

"It's the same situation at The Margaret Jackson Centre [which offers affordable counselling to adults in Devon but has a long waiting list]. When you fall outside of these safety net services provided by DPT you become in a void of being either too ill for those services or not ill enough to be referred to secondary care services.

"They call it the mental health middle gap which is a high percentage of people. It makes you feel totally dysregulated from society and alienated. It leaves you with no self-worth and feeling like no one is listening, abandoned, isolated and like you're being punished.

"A chronic stigma still exists around mental health because if you had a broken arm you would receive immediate help, but it's not the same when it comes to mental health.

"When you are in a crisis you can call the First Response Service [a 24/7 urgent mental health helpline]. Instead of being steered in the right direction, the response I have received is being told to go for a walk and if you still feel really bad to go to A&E or call an ambulance. It makes you feel totally disregarded and very vulnerable.

"When I've been wandering the streets in a mental health crisis I have been picked up by the police. They are very frustrated by it all as they are not trained as mental health support workers. It's the same with ambulance staff.

"I don't think A&E is the right place for you as a patient in a crisis and it's not right for other people waiting in A&E to witness. There is a pattern unfortunately where when there is an incident of someone in a mental health crisis they end up in a place of safety such as A&E and the police station when it could be avoided or better managed if you got the support you needed and are entitled to.

"I have been seen by some top NHS physiatrists and they say I'm vulnerable, at risk and need help but I can't get it. When you are denied support your situation rapidly deteriorates.

"I feel mental health support has got a lot worse in Exeter, not better. I am trying my best to engage to get some help. I have received counselling and therapies in the past but since the pandemic, a lot of things have disappeared and you are pushed into going to Zoom meetings online. That is challenging for people like me and especially for older people.

"I am not comfortable with one-to-one or group therapy online so as I was deemed as not willing to engage I was discharged from that service. I keep ending up in a situation of broken promises time and time again.

"You shouldn't have to bounce off the walls in a mental health crisis for someone to pay you attention and give you the help and support you are entitled to, but that is the situation I am in.

"In Exeter, there are a couple of places you can go such as Andy's Man Club. I go most weeks and have been going for 15 months but they are not professionals who can refer you for support as it's not that kind of service.

"The club is a great idea in principle and they have 30 plus men attend each week but where is the professional support for all of those people? The people who attend are in huge distress but they aren't getting any other support in Exeter.

"You end up in a situation where you are in a mental health crisis and are picked up by the police and taken to a place of safety. You are then assessed and discharged back to primary care under your GP and told to go home. That's it.

"When you're under secondary care it means care in the community and you are offered at home treatment and are appointed a care coordinator.

"In Exeter, we also have The Mooring which offers out-of-hours mental health support to anyone aged over 18, but the service has been reduced recently. I have been told it's due to either staff resourcing issues or chronic sickness.

"The most vulnerable time for people when you are in crisis is the evenings and early hours of the morning. The answer is that Devon Partnership Trust (DPT) [Devon's provider of adult mental health services] needs to be more robust in the help and support they give people as there's very little safety net when you're in a crisis.

"It needs to offer more around-the-clock services and there has to be something else they can offer people like me."

In response to the reduction of service at The Mooring, a spokesman for Devon Partnership Trust said: “We have not changed our opening hours or reduced the service we provide in Exeter but we have had to make some small changes in recent weeks because of staff sickness.

"We apologise to anyone who has been affected by these unavoidable changes. We have offered face-to-face support every day but, in some cases, this has been for a reduced number of hours. However, virtual support via telephone or video-link has remained available during all of our scheduled opening hours.”