Toyah Willcox: ‘I had tea with Princess Margaret – she wanted to see what a punk rocker looked like’

Best and worst is a regular interview in which a celebrity reflects on the highs and lows of their life

Born in Birmingham in 1958, Toyah Willcox’s breakthrough role was in Quadrophenia in 1979. From there, she juggled acting with a pop career, selling millions of records. She has continued to sing and act throughout her career with roles in Casualty and Secret Diary of a Call Girl, and she also narrated the children’s TV series Teletubbies. She lives in Dorset with her husband, the King Crimson guitarist Robert Fripp, with whom she presents the popular YouTube show Sunday Lunch.

Best childhood memory?

The simplicity of family interaction. I remember the whole family driving to a balloon festival near Clifton in Bristol when my father spotted a Mr Whippy ice cream van at nine in the morning, and he bought us all ice creams and that symbolises the pure breaking away from authoritarianism. A moment like that was just so magical.

Best day of your life?

It was an audition in April 1976 when I was at the Birmingham Old Rep Theatre School, where I didn’t realise I was the subject of the audition. I can pinpoint everything that has happened since in my life from that moment. I was in a dance class and was told two directors were coming in to look at the students. I’d actually been spotted prior to that by the wardrobe department at Pebble Mill where I’d been working as an extra in a BBC1 drama because I had this distinctive Sally Bowles-cut blue hair.

These two directors were desperate to find an actress to play the lead in a BBC2 Second City Firsts play called “Glitter” and they left with me still unaware they’d been looking at me specifically. Then the principal told me they wanted me to go to London the next day and 24 hours later I was in a room in Wigmore Street with Phil Daniels – who I went on to appear in Quadrophenia with – and I was asked to sing a song. I sang Life on Mars, did a scene with Phil, and the next day got that lead role. It was the most magnificent day of my whole life and it set off a chain reaction.

Best moment on stage?

I was playing Constanze at the Sheffield Lyceum in Amadeus with Richard McCabe playing Mozart and Tim Pigott-Smith playing Salieri. On the opening night Tim had to play the grand piano but, unlike Richard who was a breathtaking pianist, he couldn’t play so he had to mime. On this night he was talking to our characters, lifted the piano’s lid as it didn’t sound right and suddenly burst out laughing and had to turn upstage. It transpired that Judi Dench, who wasn’t there, had arranged for a little child’s pigskin glove to rest on the strings of the piano which made it sound out of tune. Judi did something similar for every opening night Tim did and to witness him totally losing it was absolutely thrilling.

Best co-star?

I appeared in a TV production of The Corn is Green in 1979 with Katharine Hepburn and she fought tooth and nail for me to play Bessie Watty. I’m a very small human being – I’m barely 5ft 1in – so I’m not your standard Hollywood actress, and Katharine adored what I represented at that time, which was women in a punk rock movement who were changing the industry to accept women as equals. She just loved me for that, because that’s who she was when she was 18.

It was only as I got older that I realised how exceptional it was at the age of 71, producing and starring in this movie and what she was up against in such a male-dominated industry. She really had to fight to have her place in this industry and in retrospect, I realised she’d given me the greatest lesson I’ve ever been given.

Best punk moment?

One of the most bizarre moments of my life was in the middle of recording Anthem and I was summoned to St James’s Palace with Katharine Hamnett, who is an all-time rebel, to have tea with the Queen Mother and Princess Margaret. I was wearing a Willy Brown dress, and my hair was bright orange with yellow streaks.

We were told we had to say ma’am and curtsey, and the Queen Mother entered and sat on one sofa with another guest and Margaret sat on my sofa with me and Katharine and said, “Oh Hello… we want to see what a punk rocker looks like,” which was just fabulous, especially as I realised later that Princess Margaret was probably the original punk rocker as she just rebelled and rebelled and rebelled. We talked about the philosophy of punk rock and how it was opening doors for women, and she was fascinated, and I met her many times after that and she was a wicked and very sharp woman.

Best personality trait?

Talent and tenacity. You’ve always got to be doing something and evolving doing something and I’m still very, very happy working. I’ve always felt as a woman every decade we reach is as a completely different human being, so it’s important to keep working through these decades, otherwise we will disappear.

Best decision?

Both Robert, my husband, and I had very dodgy management towards the end of the 1980s. I saw they were doing something they shouldn’t do. And I was the whistleblower, and I wasn’t popular for it. I can’t name names, but I can tell you that they emptied our bank accounts. They forged my name on a Coutts account and borrowed £80,000 and I managed to prove the forgery. Coutts covered the debt; I never got an apology, but one is in court today for bankruptcy. I made a decision that day to close all my bank accounts, the day I proved the forgery, and I started again. And since then, I have never allowed anyone access to my bank accounts again. It changed my life overnight.

Best advice?

The best advice I can give is listen to yourself. Listen to your instinctive voice. We have 6,200 thoughts a day. They’re there for a reason. We evolved from hunters, so we have a hunter’s brain, we have survival instinct, so listen to your own voice. If something is riling you and you think it’s wrong, you are right.

Worst childhood memory?

When I was about seven, I sat on my brother’s feet in our garden, and he propelled me into the air, and I landed in a way that could have killed me. It broke my arm; it broke my shoulder in two places. I was screaming and my brother ran away. My mother came into the garden and said, “Why are you screaming?” and then she saw the bones sticking out of my arm then she went and got a clean pair of knickers and made me change my knickers before the ambulance arrived. I was in excruciating pain but her primary concern was the grass stain on my knickers. I can’t tell you the things she put me through.

She then carried me into the lounge as I was coming in and out of consciousness and I got taken to the local children’s hospital where my main memory is the peace when my family eventually left and the wonderful, kind, caring Jamaican nurse who stayed with me all night and comforted me and held my hand. I’ll never forget her kindness.

Worst moment of your life?

My father dying. It’s something that every human being dreads. My father was a wonderful man. He was a kind man. But when I was about 12 the stock market crashed, and he lost everything so by the time I was 16 I was the family breadwinner, and I continued to support both my parents right through their old age. But I think that first loss of a parent – mother died two years later – that’s when you become an adult. You’re just completely cut free from the life you knew. I’m a pretty tough person and I’ve been through some f—ing awful things, but the worst thing was that I could never pick the phone up to him again. After that our whole family dynamic just slowly dissolved. His death just tore us apart.

Worst moment on stage?

When I was 18 in February 1977 I was in Tales from the Vienna Woods with Warren Clarke and Brenda Blethyn and I was doing a scene one night when a man in the audience suddenly announced that there was suspicious parcel under his seat, which turned out to be a genuine bomb, so the cast, crew and audience had to evacuate the theatre and go to Waterloo Bridge, where we all stayed, in full costume, until 11pm and busked for the audience, until the bomb squad had made the explosive device safe. We then went back into the theatre and finished the play.

Worst encounter?

I was friends with a Kuwaiti princess and once day she said, “Can you come over as someone wants to talk to you,” so I went over to her house and suddenly found myself sitting opposite Imelda Marcos. My immediate thought was, “what do I say to a woman who has 2,000 pairs of shoes?” but it turned out that wanted me to introduce her very gorgeous daughter to other celebrities and the upper middle classes.

Obviously, I was aware of her reputation, but I have to say that she was respectful and kind, and I just knew it was one of those situations where you don’t ask questions. I think I introduced her daughter, who was a delicate flower and very well educated, to Lady Rothermere, and took her to a few parties.

Worst personality trait?

I have big ideas that are way bigger than who I am. I just shouldn’t waste time on big ideas. I’m more realistic now. If you go out into the big wide world and see how the world sees you, and especially how young people see you, it gives you a reality check.

Toyah Willcox is performing at the Let’s Rock festival this summer. For tickets visit letsrock80s.com